Dave and I were married 30 years ago today. I remember those first few anniversaries thinking, ho hum, I mean who can’t stick it out for 3, 4, 5 years? (Well, maybe Julia Roberts and Lyle Lovett, but that's old, old news.) Then came years 15, 16, 17 and I still couldn’t drum up any true enthusiasm for our ability to keep the love alive, even though we had. The 25th year? That was okay I guess, but it wasn’t until this 30-year mark that I said OKAY, WE HAVE ARRIVED.
At least it FEELS cool, and like a truly respectable anniversary year. I mean, we’ve now been married longer than we were single, so that’s something. And we both said we’d marry each other again if we had one of those "going back in time" experiences, so that’s good.
I could probably think of at least 30 reasons why it’s been a great 30 years of marriage, I mean if I put my mind to it. But in the interest of time and space, I’m going to limit myself to the just 10:
1. He brings water to me every single night to wash down my thyroid med.
2. He grows basil and makes pesto. (I don’t particularly care for pesto but my kids do, and I like the way it makes my kitchen smell.)
3. He picks our zucchini when it’s still smallish, even though he inexplicably prefers the giant kind.
4. He feels wasteful if he spends more than $10 on a tie, or $15 on a watch (and yes, you can tell).
5. He always wants to do the right thing (even when he doesn't).
6. He doesn’t care if I spend all day, every day in my quilt room, and a corollary: He doesn’t complain when I buy fabric even though I have more than I can possibly use in this lifetime.
8. He prefers black and white movies to all sporting events.
9. He plans trips and loves exploring the world as much as I do.
10. And finally, he loves me, this I know.
I can’t remember if I’ve ever dedicated an entire blog post to my dear husband, so that’s what this is. And it puts me in mind of an old song that goes a little like this (with apologies to Mr. John)...
It's a little bit funny, this feeling inside.
I'm not one of those who can easily hide.
I don't have much money but boy if I did,
I'd buy a big pumpkin patch where we both could live.
If I was a sculptor, but then again no,
Or a woman who makes potions in a traveling show,
Oh I know it's not much, but it's the best I can do,
My gift is this blog post,
And this one's for you.
And you can tell everybody this is your blog post,
It may be quite simple but now that it's done,
I hope you don't mind,
I hope you don't mind,
That I put down in words,
How wonderful life is while you're in the world.
I didn’t sit on the roof, or kick off the moss (huh?),
And signing into my blog, well it got me quite cross.
But the sun's been quite kind,
While I wrote this blog post.
It's for a husband like you that,
I finally got the computer turned on.
And you can tell everybody this is your blog post,
It may be quite simple but
Now that it's done,
I hope you don't mind,
I hope you don't mind,
That I put down in words,
How wonderful life is while you're in the world.
And I mean that.
Tuesday, September 19, 2017
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
NIECE BETSY TAKES A HUSBAND - Part 1
WITH HER FIRST HELLO...
The story is told that Thomas and Betsy were introduced to each other by a mutual acquaintance...or something like that. But that whole "how they met" thing is now water under the bridge, and I really don’t want to bog down my wedding series with too much prefatory material. Suffice it to say that when they finally started "dating" in February of 2009, they hit it off fairly quickly. The only downside was that Betsy was scheduled to leave in July of that year for a 7-month stint of working in an orphanage in Zambia.
So I’m told that Thomas was determined to keep their romance in the shallow end, and not to do anything silly like fall in love and wait around for her to get back. But things do not always go according to plan, do they? And the next thing he knew, he found himself in the deep end of this romance...way in over his head...and she was too of course. And then they were crying like babies when she left on that plane to Africa...and the rest, as they say, is history.
So let’s fast forward to a day in early May 2010, shall we? Otherwise, this wedding series will go on and on like...well, like another wedding series might have done. We were all busy minding our own business down there in Edmond one Saturday. The girls and I had gone down to register Emily for college, and we somehow got the news that there was to be a proposal at a park at such and such time and we were all invited to come celebrate and eat cake, if she said yes, that is. And she did, but I think I already wrote about that whole affair at the time it happened, so if you’re interested you can check that old post. Meanwhile let’s move on, shall we?
The next wedding related business that I got in on was the actual DRESS BUYING. Yes, Emily and I happened to be down in Edmond again, for some reason or other, when they announced that the bride-to-be was headed out to try on dresses and all her female relatives were invited to come along. So it became a party, with about 10 of us traipsing into this fairly small bridal shop, and filling up all their chairs, and clogging up most of their aisles. And everyone had an opinion on everything, of course, so that’s fun. And I tried to be discriminating like everyone else and make helpful comments like "oh, that waist is too high or low or something". But secretly I thought she looked beautiful in every single thing she tried on.
And ultimately the decision had to be Betsy’s anyway. And she finally settled on this lovely one-strapped concoction with 3D flowery things scattered about, and some great shirring through the bodice and waist, and a gorgeous train and floor length sheer veil which I would love to describe for you, but you know I can’t so I won’t even try. So they said they’d take it...and it was such a beautiful moment that even the ching-ching of the credit card machine couldn’t dampen our spirits.
Of course watching the mother-daughter-sisters interaction at such a momentous occasion spurred me on to thinking about the past...and my wedding dress. My mother made it, which sounds very cool but in reality, it was just cheaper that way. She was a master seamstress, but didn’t have much experience in the wedding dress-making business, other than the dress she’d made for Sally, which turned out well. So she found a pattern that I liked and gamely went forward, and I remember being happy with the result, but the truth is I had nothing to compare it with because I never tried on any commercially-made wedding dresses. Looking back, I don’t remember visiting even one single bridal shop prior to my wedding. The bottom line was that I was 29 years old, and I think we were all so relieved I was finally getting married, that no one worried too much about the wedding details, not even me.
Betsy’s dress buying also made me think about the future and helping my own daughters pick out a wedding dress some day. And I look forward to those days, knowing they will be memorable, and probably even enjoyable on many levels. But I can’t help feeling a tiny sense of dread too, knowing that it will foreshadow the closing of another chapter in our lives as mothers and daughters. So there will have to be some more of that crying business, if my sister’s clan is any example of what goes on during wedding planning.
So that was some major digressing from the real story...but you know I can’t help it. Next up, we get invited to Betsy’s personal shower...sort of. And on that note, I better close this first chapter.
For lunch today, I had T&WT, a slice of dutch apple pie (my favorite) made by my husband, and some peach yogurt.
The story is told that Thomas and Betsy were introduced to each other by a mutual acquaintance...or something like that. But that whole "how they met" thing is now water under the bridge, and I really don’t want to bog down my wedding series with too much prefatory material. Suffice it to say that when they finally started "dating" in February of 2009, they hit it off fairly quickly. The only downside was that Betsy was scheduled to leave in July of that year for a 7-month stint of working in an orphanage in Zambia.
So I’m told that Thomas was determined to keep their romance in the shallow end, and not to do anything silly like fall in love and wait around for her to get back. But things do not always go according to plan, do they? And the next thing he knew, he found himself in the deep end of this romance...way in over his head...and she was too of course. And then they were crying like babies when she left on that plane to Africa...and the rest, as they say, is history.
So let’s fast forward to a day in early May 2010, shall we? Otherwise, this wedding series will go on and on like...well, like another wedding series might have done. We were all busy minding our own business down there in Edmond one Saturday. The girls and I had gone down to register Emily for college, and we somehow got the news that there was to be a proposal at a park at such and such time and we were all invited to come celebrate and eat cake, if she said yes, that is. And she did, but I think I already wrote about that whole affair at the time it happened, so if you’re interested you can check that old post. Meanwhile let’s move on, shall we?
The next wedding related business that I got in on was the actual DRESS BUYING. Yes, Emily and I happened to be down in Edmond again, for some reason or other, when they announced that the bride-to-be was headed out to try on dresses and all her female relatives were invited to come along. So it became a party, with about 10 of us traipsing into this fairly small bridal shop, and filling up all their chairs, and clogging up most of their aisles. And everyone had an opinion on everything, of course, so that’s fun. And I tried to be discriminating like everyone else and make helpful comments like "oh, that waist is too high or low or something". But secretly I thought she looked beautiful in every single thing she tried on.
And ultimately the decision had to be Betsy’s anyway. And she finally settled on this lovely one-strapped concoction with 3D flowery things scattered about, and some great shirring through the bodice and waist, and a gorgeous train and floor length sheer veil which I would love to describe for you, but you know I can’t so I won’t even try. So they said they’d take it...and it was such a beautiful moment that even the ching-ching of the credit card machine couldn’t dampen our spirits.
Of course watching the mother-daughter-sisters interaction at such a momentous occasion spurred me on to thinking about the past...and my wedding dress. My mother made it, which sounds very cool but in reality, it was just cheaper that way. She was a master seamstress, but didn’t have much experience in the wedding dress-making business, other than the dress she’d made for Sally, which turned out well. So she found a pattern that I liked and gamely went forward, and I remember being happy with the result, but the truth is I had nothing to compare it with because I never tried on any commercially-made wedding dresses. Looking back, I don’t remember visiting even one single bridal shop prior to my wedding. The bottom line was that I was 29 years old, and I think we were all so relieved I was finally getting married, that no one worried too much about the wedding details, not even me.
Betsy’s dress buying also made me think about the future and helping my own daughters pick out a wedding dress some day. And I look forward to those days, knowing they will be memorable, and probably even enjoyable on many levels. But I can’t help feeling a tiny sense of dread too, knowing that it will foreshadow the closing of another chapter in our lives as mothers and daughters. So there will have to be some more of that crying business, if my sister’s clan is any example of what goes on during wedding planning.
So that was some major digressing from the real story...but you know I can’t help it. Next up, we get invited to Betsy’s personal shower...sort of. And on that note, I better close this first chapter.
For lunch today, I had T&WT, a slice of dutch apple pie (my favorite) made by my husband, and some peach yogurt.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
LOST AND FOUND
So I’m pretty sure no one is still waiting with bated breath for my Betsy/Thomas wedding series to begin. At least I hope not, because I want it to be like when you lose...let’s say maybe the charger to your camera. And you search high and low for it (literally), and you accuse a lot of people around you of misplacing it, but finally you give up and start taking pictures with your cell phone. And then one day, you decide to clean up your bedroom and open a bag and find that long-lost charger right where you left it weeks ago. And you’re overjoyed, because you never quite adjusted to using your cell phone for a camera anyway. So I’m hoping you will feel that same kind of joy when you finally sign on to this blog and find that the wedding story has begun, because that which you thought was lost to you forever, will have been found.
And on that note, I have a few lines for you from a little poem about lost stuff which I borrowed from Edmund Spenser (who is a real poet):
"For whatsoever from one place doth fall, Is with the tide unto another brought: For there is nothing lost, that may be found, if sought."
Isn’t that beautiful? And I’m sure its meaning is very deep, but for me I just think of it when I’m looking for something...like a camera charger.
But I don’t want you to think I’m trying to pacify you and regain your affections with just a bit of high-brow poetry...so let me assure you that Part One of the wedding series is basically written, and will be posted here in the next few days. If all goes well.
Meanwhile, I wanted to tell you about the peacoat Dave gave me last year for Christmas. And again, I don’t like to brag, but for a man, this guy is unbelievably thoughtful when it comes to gift-giving. One time he SNUCK my broken string of pearls out of my dresser drawer and had them re-strung for me. On Mother’s Day a few years back, I stepped outside to find pots and pots of geraniums scattered about my front steps. And for my anniversary this past September, he secretly hauled my Honda scooter which hadn’t started for several years to a mechanic and had it repaired. And that may sound like more of a gift for him rather than for me, because yes, I’m over the weight limit for the scooter anyway. But I’m abnormally attached to the thing, because it belonged to my parents, and my mom rode it, and it was part of my "inheritance." Yeah, some people have their mother’s china cabinet or maybe even her wedding dress, but I have my mother’s scooter. And I had been whining about the fact that no one could ride it, and Dave fixed that for me, and it was seriously no small thing.
So you see, Dave really is a prince when it comes to thoughtful gifts. And that’s why I don’t want you to judge him too harshly by what I’m about to tell you regarding the dreaded peacoat. In truth, this gift also SEEMED perfect at the time he gave it to me. I needed a coat and it looked lovely coming out of that box last Christmas morning. But after only a few outings, it began to display its one painfully obvious flaw. It’s black, and therefore it needs the CONSTANT attention of a lint brush.
Now everyone knows that I barely take the time to brush my hair in the mornings, so you can just imagine how much I despise having to take the time to brush my coat too. As such, I don’t brush it nearly enough, and therefore I look even more unkempt than usual, at least on cold days. Lately, I’ve noticed my family and friends picking the lint off me wherever and whenever they so choose, and I’m wondering how many total strangers have been tempted but too shy to do the same.
So this morning when I put on the dreaded coat, I was actually thinking that my only hope was that they really DON’T make things like they used to. Because didn’t people wear their winter coats for years and years back in the those good old days? And I’m not sure I can take years and years with this coat. For once, I hope that whoever crafted this thing embraced the whole modern shoddy workmanship philosophy...so it will literally fall apart at the seams, someday soon, and I can start over. Of course, I won’t be surprised if in a cruel twist of fate, this coat will be prove to be indestructible. I will keep you posted.
I couldn’t think of a better way to celebrate my return to the blogging fold than to enjoy a delicious lunch of tuna and wheat thins today. For dessert, I had a piece of warm-from-the-oven cherry pie, made by my husband who has inexplicably become a pie-baking machine lately. But that story will have to wait for another day.
And on that note, I have a few lines for you from a little poem about lost stuff which I borrowed from Edmund Spenser (who is a real poet):
"For whatsoever from one place doth fall, Is with the tide unto another brought: For there is nothing lost, that may be found, if sought."
Isn’t that beautiful? And I’m sure its meaning is very deep, but for me I just think of it when I’m looking for something...like a camera charger.
But I don’t want you to think I’m trying to pacify you and regain your affections with just a bit of high-brow poetry...so let me assure you that Part One of the wedding series is basically written, and will be posted here in the next few days. If all goes well.
Meanwhile, I wanted to tell you about the peacoat Dave gave me last year for Christmas. And again, I don’t like to brag, but for a man, this guy is unbelievably thoughtful when it comes to gift-giving. One time he SNUCK my broken string of pearls out of my dresser drawer and had them re-strung for me. On Mother’s Day a few years back, I stepped outside to find pots and pots of geraniums scattered about my front steps. And for my anniversary this past September, he secretly hauled my Honda scooter which hadn’t started for several years to a mechanic and had it repaired. And that may sound like more of a gift for him rather than for me, because yes, I’m over the weight limit for the scooter anyway. But I’m abnormally attached to the thing, because it belonged to my parents, and my mom rode it, and it was part of my "inheritance." Yeah, some people have their mother’s china cabinet or maybe even her wedding dress, but I have my mother’s scooter. And I had been whining about the fact that no one could ride it, and Dave fixed that for me, and it was seriously no small thing.
So you see, Dave really is a prince when it comes to thoughtful gifts. And that’s why I don’t want you to judge him too harshly by what I’m about to tell you regarding the dreaded peacoat. In truth, this gift also SEEMED perfect at the time he gave it to me. I needed a coat and it looked lovely coming out of that box last Christmas morning. But after only a few outings, it began to display its one painfully obvious flaw. It’s black, and therefore it needs the CONSTANT attention of a lint brush.
Now everyone knows that I barely take the time to brush my hair in the mornings, so you can just imagine how much I despise having to take the time to brush my coat too. As such, I don’t brush it nearly enough, and therefore I look even more unkempt than usual, at least on cold days. Lately, I’ve noticed my family and friends picking the lint off me wherever and whenever they so choose, and I’m wondering how many total strangers have been tempted but too shy to do the same.
So this morning when I put on the dreaded coat, I was actually thinking that my only hope was that they really DON’T make things like they used to. Because didn’t people wear their winter coats for years and years back in the those good old days? And I’m not sure I can take years and years with this coat. For once, I hope that whoever crafted this thing embraced the whole modern shoddy workmanship philosophy...so it will literally fall apart at the seams, someday soon, and I can start over. Of course, I won’t be surprised if in a cruel twist of fate, this coat will be prove to be indestructible. I will keep you posted.
I couldn’t think of a better way to celebrate my return to the blogging fold than to enjoy a delicious lunch of tuna and wheat thins today. For dessert, I had a piece of warm-from-the-oven cherry pie, made by my husband who has inexplicably become a pie-baking machine lately. But that story will have to wait for another day.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
THE SLIPPERY SLOPE
This blog is officially over a year old now. I would like to celebrate my big First Anniversary by offering my followers a 10% discount on something. But I’m not sure what.
I figured out I’d been at this a year when I was describing the free things we pick up at the State Fair and it all started sounding vaguely familiar. Sure enough, I wrote about this annual family event back in September of ‘09. So now I’m a little worried that every future post will read like a bad sequel...with the same predictable characters, jaded locales, tired plots. And it may be a slippery slope from there to posts that read like cheap dime-store novels and People magazine articles. I apologize up front if that happens.
So yes, a couple of weekends ago, 18 of those same old family members put in another appearance at the fair. Actually, we did have one new face because Emily met us there with a new friend from college named Jordan. (I believe the better sequels introduce new and interesting characters to the mix, so we’ll try that approach here.) And Jordan was soon as enthralled as the rest of us with all the cool fair stuff…like the life-size butter sculpture, the seriously oversized watermelons, and the rows and rows of chickens in cages. And who wouldn’t be impressed with how adept my sisters are at finding the free stuff? The rest of us just follow them around like puppy dogs, saying, “Hey, where did you get that toothpick holder?” I’m pretty sure Jordan had a good time with that, because she went along quite willingly with Emily to feign interest in a certain community college so they could score some free chapstick.
One new fair event surfaced this year. After enjoying a tasty lunch of homemade Bierocks, apple dumplings, and hot beef sandwiches, we eagerly made our way over to see the “Wild About Monkeys” show. That’s when we discovered this was a hot ticket because all of the bleachers were filled. Not to worry. There was plenty of seating on the grass in front of the stage, and even though a lot of us are too old to be sitting cross-legged on the ground, we weren’t about to pass up a free monkey show. So we sat down to wait.
And that’s when I discovered how extremely hot it was, especially sitting in the full sun, and that’s when the entire grassy area filled up with masses of humanity so that a person couldn’t escape even if he or she wanted to. And that’s when my 3-year-old nephew started slinging a Styrofoam cup around and into a few strangers’ faces. And I think that was the moment when I began to feel HOT AND TRAPPED. But I didn’t complain too much, because naturally I was trying not to embarrass Emily in front of her new friend.
Finally, the show began. And as monkey shows go, it was fairly entertaining…with your usual monkey shenanigans and tricks. But the best part was actually when a bird flew out into the audience and got a dollar bill from a lady and then returned it. I’m guessing the bird’s agent was asleep on the job, or the show would have been billed “Wild about Monkeys AND a Bird”.
If you’ve read my “illustrated” blog on the OC website, you may be wondering why I don’t post pictures on this blog as well. But do you look for illustrations when you read Jane Austen? Or Fyodor Dostoyevsky? I think not. Obviously, this is my “thinking” man’s blog, and that other one is my commercial sell out. Not that they’re paying me, but you know what I mean.
So I was going to do a quick family update…but it’s too late for that. So I’ll think about that tomorrow. The wedding series is still progressing in outline form, but is not quite ready for publication. I haven’t had lunch yet today, but hope to enjoy a nice Gala apple, and some tuna and Wheat Thins when the time comes. Good night!
I figured out I’d been at this a year when I was describing the free things we pick up at the State Fair and it all started sounding vaguely familiar. Sure enough, I wrote about this annual family event back in September of ‘09. So now I’m a little worried that every future post will read like a bad sequel...with the same predictable characters, jaded locales, tired plots. And it may be a slippery slope from there to posts that read like cheap dime-store novels and People magazine articles. I apologize up front if that happens.
So yes, a couple of weekends ago, 18 of those same old family members put in another appearance at the fair. Actually, we did have one new face because Emily met us there with a new friend from college named Jordan. (I believe the better sequels introduce new and interesting characters to the mix, so we’ll try that approach here.) And Jordan was soon as enthralled as the rest of us with all the cool fair stuff…like the life-size butter sculpture, the seriously oversized watermelons, and the rows and rows of chickens in cages. And who wouldn’t be impressed with how adept my sisters are at finding the free stuff? The rest of us just follow them around like puppy dogs, saying, “Hey, where did you get that toothpick holder?” I’m pretty sure Jordan had a good time with that, because she went along quite willingly with Emily to feign interest in a certain community college so they could score some free chapstick.
One new fair event surfaced this year. After enjoying a tasty lunch of homemade Bierocks, apple dumplings, and hot beef sandwiches, we eagerly made our way over to see the “Wild About Monkeys” show. That’s when we discovered this was a hot ticket because all of the bleachers were filled. Not to worry. There was plenty of seating on the grass in front of the stage, and even though a lot of us are too old to be sitting cross-legged on the ground, we weren’t about to pass up a free monkey show. So we sat down to wait.
And that’s when I discovered how extremely hot it was, especially sitting in the full sun, and that’s when the entire grassy area filled up with masses of humanity so that a person couldn’t escape even if he or she wanted to. And that’s when my 3-year-old nephew started slinging a Styrofoam cup around and into a few strangers’ faces. And I think that was the moment when I began to feel HOT AND TRAPPED. But I didn’t complain too much, because naturally I was trying not to embarrass Emily in front of her new friend.
Finally, the show began. And as monkey shows go, it was fairly entertaining…with your usual monkey shenanigans and tricks. But the best part was actually when a bird flew out into the audience and got a dollar bill from a lady and then returned it. I’m guessing the bird’s agent was asleep on the job, or the show would have been billed “Wild about Monkeys AND a Bird”.
If you’ve read my “illustrated” blog on the OC website, you may be wondering why I don’t post pictures on this blog as well. But do you look for illustrations when you read Jane Austen? Or Fyodor Dostoyevsky? I think not. Obviously, this is my “thinking” man’s blog, and that other one is my commercial sell out. Not that they’re paying me, but you know what I mean.
So I was going to do a quick family update…but it’s too late for that. So I’ll think about that tomorrow. The wedding series is still progressing in outline form, but is not quite ready for publication. I haven’t had lunch yet today, but hope to enjoy a nice Gala apple, and some tuna and Wheat Thins when the time comes. Good night!
Thursday, September 16, 2010
SO MANY BLOGS, SO LITTLE TIME
Lest you think I have forgotten my first love, or blog, if you will, let me assure you I am not abandoning this ship. But you must understand that I’m still in the honeymoon stage with the OC blog...so I might possibly be dedicating a bit more time and energy over there at the moment.
This business of maintaining two blogs may look glamorous, but let me assure you, it has its dark side. It’s not just the physical demands of writing post after post after post, but there’s a good deal of mental and emotional strain to bear as well. If I write in one, I feel guilty for ignoring the other. I want to be devoted and loyal to both, but there’s only so much of me to go around. This is how I know I could never be a bigamist, or even one of those two-timing wives. The truth is, I can barely keep up with more than one Bingo card at our New Year’s Eve parties, so you can imagine how juggling two blogs is getting to me.
Nevertheless, I am pressing on. I have a rough outline of the Betsy/Thomas wedding posts nearly finished. I even have a working title. How does "NIECE BETSY TAKES A HUSBAND" sound to you? Maybe it’s a bit one-sided, but if Thomas wants more press, he might have to recruit a blogger from his side of the family. Unfortunately, I didn’t even MEET half of his groomsmen, so "that one guy" might be an oft-used phrase in the wedding posts.
But today, I just have a few family notes for you on everyone but Emily, who will of course be dealt with in that "other" blog.
So we’ll start here with Rachel, and I have BIG NEWS about her. She has finally found...and SECURED...her Prince Charming. If you recall, she is dancing the part of Cinderella in the ballet in December, and we were feeling somewhat desperate about her chances of finding a high school boy who was (a) prince-like, (b) willing to dance in a ballet, AND (c) able to bench-press quite a few pounds. But just when we were thinking such a boy did not exist, along came Christian. After the first practice, it was apparent he was our guy because as one of Rachel’s friends put it, "When he picked Rachel up, his face didn’t even turn red!"
In other Rachel news, she continues to act as my personal trainer on a somewhat sporadic basis...basically whenever the mood strikes her. She told me one day that I could burn 100 calories just by drinking a glass of ice water. I told her that couldn’t be true because I drink lots of ice water and don’t lose weight. She just gave me a contemptuous smile. And I use that word only because I recently read this book in which everyone and everything was contemptuous at one time or another. Even a lady’s SHOES are described as contemptuous in one passage. So I thought I’d try it out in my writing.
On to David. Earlier this week, he got his phone taken away by a teacher at school. He was outside the school building walking to his next class, but apparently he still wasn’t supposed to be texting. And I guess it’s no big deal, because when I went to the office to retrieve the phone, they didn’t set me down and tell me I was a bad parent or he was a bad kid or anything. What bothers me is that now there’s a "behavior incident" on his school record, and it’s coded as a CONTRABAND infraction. Last year when Emily forgot her ID badge at school, her behavior incident was recorded as a DRESS CODE infraction. So now the entire school system probably thinks my son is a druggie and my daughter is a skank. And I don’t know how to fight this kind of thing.
Dave is busy training for a triathlon...and stressing over the details. His biggest struggle was in deciding if he needed a wet suit and he kept going to the website and reading posts to me about water temperatures. I didn’t beg him to stop, but I wanted to. He finally ordered a new Speedo swimsuit and we are all hoping it won’t be too revealing.
As for me, I had an interesting dream several weeks ago, where someone (I don’t remember who) was showing me a live, white owl they kept in their freezer. I wanted to tell you about this dream when it happened, but I was in the middle of my wedding series, and didn’t know how to fit it in.
Even my mother would be sick of hearing this by now, because yes, I had tuna and Wheat Thins for lunch again today. Does it help that for dessert, I had some chocolate zucchini bread made by a lady in my office? I hope so.
This business of maintaining two blogs may look glamorous, but let me assure you, it has its dark side. It’s not just the physical demands of writing post after post after post, but there’s a good deal of mental and emotional strain to bear as well. If I write in one, I feel guilty for ignoring the other. I want to be devoted and loyal to both, but there’s only so much of me to go around. This is how I know I could never be a bigamist, or even one of those two-timing wives. The truth is, I can barely keep up with more than one Bingo card at our New Year’s Eve parties, so you can imagine how juggling two blogs is getting to me.
Nevertheless, I am pressing on. I have a rough outline of the Betsy/Thomas wedding posts nearly finished. I even have a working title. How does "NIECE BETSY TAKES A HUSBAND" sound to you? Maybe it’s a bit one-sided, but if Thomas wants more press, he might have to recruit a blogger from his side of the family. Unfortunately, I didn’t even MEET half of his groomsmen, so "that one guy" might be an oft-used phrase in the wedding posts.
But today, I just have a few family notes for you on everyone but Emily, who will of course be dealt with in that "other" blog.
So we’ll start here with Rachel, and I have BIG NEWS about her. She has finally found...and SECURED...her Prince Charming. If you recall, she is dancing the part of Cinderella in the ballet in December, and we were feeling somewhat desperate about her chances of finding a high school boy who was (a) prince-like, (b) willing to dance in a ballet, AND (c) able to bench-press quite a few pounds. But just when we were thinking such a boy did not exist, along came Christian. After the first practice, it was apparent he was our guy because as one of Rachel’s friends put it, "When he picked Rachel up, his face didn’t even turn red!"
In other Rachel news, she continues to act as my personal trainer on a somewhat sporadic basis...basically whenever the mood strikes her. She told me one day that I could burn 100 calories just by drinking a glass of ice water. I told her that couldn’t be true because I drink lots of ice water and don’t lose weight. She just gave me a contemptuous smile. And I use that word only because I recently read this book in which everyone and everything was contemptuous at one time or another. Even a lady’s SHOES are described as contemptuous in one passage. So I thought I’d try it out in my writing.
On to David. Earlier this week, he got his phone taken away by a teacher at school. He was outside the school building walking to his next class, but apparently he still wasn’t supposed to be texting. And I guess it’s no big deal, because when I went to the office to retrieve the phone, they didn’t set me down and tell me I was a bad parent or he was a bad kid or anything. What bothers me is that now there’s a "behavior incident" on his school record, and it’s coded as a CONTRABAND infraction. Last year when Emily forgot her ID badge at school, her behavior incident was recorded as a DRESS CODE infraction. So now the entire school system probably thinks my son is a druggie and my daughter is a skank. And I don’t know how to fight this kind of thing.
Dave is busy training for a triathlon...and stressing over the details. His biggest struggle was in deciding if he needed a wet suit and he kept going to the website and reading posts to me about water temperatures. I didn’t beg him to stop, but I wanted to. He finally ordered a new Speedo swimsuit and we are all hoping it won’t be too revealing.
As for me, I had an interesting dream several weeks ago, where someone (I don’t remember who) was showing me a live, white owl they kept in their freezer. I wanted to tell you about this dream when it happened, but I was in the middle of my wedding series, and didn’t know how to fit it in.
Even my mother would be sick of hearing this by now, because yes, I had tuna and Wheat Thins for lunch again today. Does it help that for dessert, I had some chocolate zucchini bread made by a lady in my office? I hope so.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
A NEW ACTION PLAN
I’m free. Free at last. Not that I would ever call my commitment to the wedding series anything like an ALBATROSS. No. I would never do that. But it did require some actual THINKING, and I must admit that I’m happy to go back to my rambling, stream-of-consciousness writing style.
But first, I do have one final post-script on the wedding. I received a lovely thank you note from the HC the other day, and while I found it slightly odd that no mention was made of the wedding series, I couldn’t fault the note in any other way. In fact, it was clearly a cut above your average run-of-the-mill thank you note, being not only extremely thoughtful but also rather lengthy. But while this was all BEYOND sweet, I was troubled by one simple fact. This note was obviously penned by Ben himself. Which started me thinking of course. I mean if he’s got enough time to write notes like this, then chances are he’s not dedicating himself to the study of the causes and treatment of hives. As such, I have decided I better not wait for him to finish med school, and have developed a new two-step action plan for my health care.
First, I am going to get on-line and offer my body to science. I’ve heard that you can volunteer for studies and since I find my case fascinating, I’m pretty sure research scientists will too. If possible, I will try to join a study where the subjects get paid. That way, if they don’t find out what my problem is and how to fix it, then at least it won’t be a complete waste of my time.
And second, I am going to break down and purchase one of those pill organizer things.
I will try to get a family update posted soon, but our biggest news is of course about the emigration of Emily to the far country of Oklahoma. As most of you know, we dropped her off at OC on August 21st and came home to a decidedly emptier house. I miss the little tyke, but she’s happy so I can’t wish her back. If you are a true glutton for punishment, you can read much more about the whole Emily-in-college thing on the parent blog I’m doing for OC. The address is www.blogs.oc.edu/shelley for the diehards among you.
I had two delicious homemade tamales for lunch today, which I bought from a lady who came by our office selling them.
But first, I do have one final post-script on the wedding. I received a lovely thank you note from the HC the other day, and while I found it slightly odd that no mention was made of the wedding series, I couldn’t fault the note in any other way. In fact, it was clearly a cut above your average run-of-the-mill thank you note, being not only extremely thoughtful but also rather lengthy. But while this was all BEYOND sweet, I was troubled by one simple fact. This note was obviously penned by Ben himself. Which started me thinking of course. I mean if he’s got enough time to write notes like this, then chances are he’s not dedicating himself to the study of the causes and treatment of hives. As such, I have decided I better not wait for him to finish med school, and have developed a new two-step action plan for my health care.
First, I am going to get on-line and offer my body to science. I’ve heard that you can volunteer for studies and since I find my case fascinating, I’m pretty sure research scientists will too. If possible, I will try to join a study where the subjects get paid. That way, if they don’t find out what my problem is and how to fix it, then at least it won’t be a complete waste of my time.
And second, I am going to break down and purchase one of those pill organizer things.
I will try to get a family update posted soon, but our biggest news is of course about the emigration of Emily to the far country of Oklahoma. As most of you know, we dropped her off at OC on August 21st and came home to a decidedly emptier house. I miss the little tyke, but she’s happy so I can’t wish her back. If you are a true glutton for punishment, you can read much more about the whole Emily-in-college thing on the parent blog I’m doing for OC. The address is www.blogs.oc.edu/shelley for the diehards among you.
I had two delicious homemade tamales for lunch today, which I bought from a lady who came by our office selling them.
Monday, September 6, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 12 of 12 (WHEW!)
The Dance and A Conclusion
WILL THEY OR WON’T THEY?: I believe there was some concern about whether or not anyone would actually USE the dance floor at the wedding...besides Ben and Courtney who were going to do a "first dance", and all those little kids who couldn’t seem to stop running around in circles on it. I don’t know Courtney’s family history with dancing, but I can and will tell you ours.
THE TEEN PREGNANCY ISSUE: My sisters and I did not attend high school dances. Mom didn’t tell us we couldn’t go, but we knew she frowned upon these heathen affairs and so we just said no. After all, everyone knew back then that teenage girls usually got pregnant immediately following a high school dance. Of course my parents were pretty much through with parenting by the time my brothers hit their high school years, so I think they went to as many dances as they wanted. And they didn’t get any girls pregnant so that was good. But they also didn’t bring dancing into vogue within our family. I believe we all still viewed "dancing" as a somewhat shady activity...and one that could possibly lead to all sorts of evil, including the chance of looking stupid in front of your friends. So we just didn’t go there.
DANCE FEVER: But years passed, and the next generation entered the picture. Next thing we knew, my sister Sally was almost forcing her son Zach to go to middle school dances because she thought he was so pathetic sitting at home alone. I think that was the excuse. And my sister Susan followed suit. Soon I had a gaggle of loose-living nephews and nieces attending dance after dance and obviously headed for trouble. But guess what? They all turned out pretty nice after all. Some of them even became...missionaries. True story. Not that they don’t have some bad habits, but I don’t think their tendencies to be bossy and bicker about athletic teams are a direct result of dancing in high school. Nevertheless, this was our first family wedding reception that included a dance floor. And at least one person was heard to say that without any alcohol being served, the dance floor would most likely not be filling up too fast.
DANCING KINGS AND QUEENS: But that person was wrong. True, the dancing started a bit slow but it built to just the right sort of frenzy for a family-oriented wedding reception. Everyone had a good time doing those line dance things where you "slide to the left" and "kick it" and "walk it by yourself" or something like that. And no one did anything even slightly shady...well, unless you count when Luke ACCIDENTALLY backed into someone he shouldn’t have. But these things happen on a crowded dance floor and maybe that’s what my mother was worried about. But the point is, it seemed like good clean fun at the time. And definitely no worse than that Hokey-Pokey number we did at the skating rink when we were kids...with our mom’s full blessing.
PARTING IS SUCH SWEET SORROW: All good things must come to an end...and so it goes with all wedding series blog posts. Ha ha. I’m just kidding. I meant that the actual wedding was the GOOD THING that had to come to an end. So the bouquet was tossed (to my Emily I might add) and the garter was slung (I didn’t register to whom), and the HC were sent off in a shower of sparks from a sparkler-wielding crowd. And I seem to recall even a fireworks display...unless I’m confusing the wedding with our 4th of July outing several weeks later. But I don’t think I am. Because I think my 14-year-old son was one of the lighters of the fireworks and I hope that wasn’t some kind of illegal activity, but it’s a little too late to worry about that now.
LOVE AND A LITTLE BIT MORE: According to the Beatles...or maybe Lynden David Hall...All you Need is Love. I think that song played at some point during the wedding which is why I’m mentioning it here. And while it’s a nice sentiment, it’s not really true of course. In the case of this wedding, in addition to a goodly amount of love, Ben and Courtney needed a truly gorgeous venue, an army of family and friends, and some tasty donuts and snow cones, among other things, to make their special day come together.
DREAM SEQUENCES IN GENERAL: Several winters ago, Luke and Amanda made a car trip to Kansas during which the following three things happened simultaneously:
1. A gentle snow was falling,
2. A Christmas song was playing on the radio, AND
3. They spotted some deer frolicking (their word, not mine) in a field by the side of the road.
Each of the individual elements of this moment was nice, but they called the combination a "dream sequence". Shortly thereafter, as we are wont to do, our family began to not only overuse that phrase, but we also tended to misapply it. I mean it’s nice to find a forgotten toothpick in your purse right after a chips and salsa binge at Ranchito, but I think we can all agree it doesn’t qualify as a Dream Sequence.
DREAM SEQUENCES, SPECIFICALLY: So I hope no one will accuse me of being trite when I say that this particular wedding weekend qualified as being the ultimate in Dream Sequences. Because all the elements certainly combined to make it one. Which is nice because the problem with weddings for people like Ben and Courtney is that there probably won’t be any do-overs. They needed to get it right the first time, and I think they succeeded. And now we just get to wait and see what the future holds for the HC. And which side of the family the future little Hawleys will resemble the most. My bet must be with the Hawley side because they seem to have some dominant features. Courtney probably didn’t think about that when she said yes to Ben. And I for one am glad she didn’t.
So that concludes my tale of one wedding. I truly hope that I am not another Harper Lee. You know she only published the one novel (To Kill a Mockingbird) and the success of it so overwhelmed her that she never wrote another. But I don’t think that will happen to me. No matter how popular my first wedding series happens to be (and I know for a fact that at least 5 people waited anxiously for each installment), I am still committed to giving you the story of the Betsy/Thomas nuptials.
But for now, I must take a short break from weddings in general and give you some family news. So looking ahead, here are the titles of some of my next few blog posts which have been preempted by the wedding series:
1. My Jumbo-Sized Summer Vacation
2. The Wreck of the Jeep Liberty
3. The Pumpkin-Whisperer (revisited)
4. A More Efficient Way to Read a Classic, like The Fountainhead
If those titles don’t bring you back for more, I don’t know what will.
We were invited to a fish fry for lunch today...and not only was the fish PERFECT in every way, but the side dishes brought by the other guests were scrumptious as well. I made that lovely sweet coleslaw with whipping cream, but first I had to call around to get the recipe because my Haven Cookbook has gone MISSING. I don’t cook much so I tend to misplace recipes now and again. But I think this might be the first time I’ve lost a whole cookbook. To make matters worse, after the fish fry I went to pick up my dish, and it had turned up missing too. I’m sure the missing cookbook has nothing to do with the missing coleslaw, but it’s disturbing all the same. Because I was looking forwarding to eating the leftover slaw.
WILL THEY OR WON’T THEY?: I believe there was some concern about whether or not anyone would actually USE the dance floor at the wedding...besides Ben and Courtney who were going to do a "first dance", and all those little kids who couldn’t seem to stop running around in circles on it. I don’t know Courtney’s family history with dancing, but I can and will tell you ours.
THE TEEN PREGNANCY ISSUE: My sisters and I did not attend high school dances. Mom didn’t tell us we couldn’t go, but we knew she frowned upon these heathen affairs and so we just said no. After all, everyone knew back then that teenage girls usually got pregnant immediately following a high school dance. Of course my parents were pretty much through with parenting by the time my brothers hit their high school years, so I think they went to as many dances as they wanted. And they didn’t get any girls pregnant so that was good. But they also didn’t bring dancing into vogue within our family. I believe we all still viewed "dancing" as a somewhat shady activity...and one that could possibly lead to all sorts of evil, including the chance of looking stupid in front of your friends. So we just didn’t go there.
DANCE FEVER: But years passed, and the next generation entered the picture. Next thing we knew, my sister Sally was almost forcing her son Zach to go to middle school dances because she thought he was so pathetic sitting at home alone. I think that was the excuse. And my sister Susan followed suit. Soon I had a gaggle of loose-living nephews and nieces attending dance after dance and obviously headed for trouble. But guess what? They all turned out pretty nice after all. Some of them even became...missionaries. True story. Not that they don’t have some bad habits, but I don’t think their tendencies to be bossy and bicker about athletic teams are a direct result of dancing in high school. Nevertheless, this was our first family wedding reception that included a dance floor. And at least one person was heard to say that without any alcohol being served, the dance floor would most likely not be filling up too fast.
DANCING KINGS AND QUEENS: But that person was wrong. True, the dancing started a bit slow but it built to just the right sort of frenzy for a family-oriented wedding reception. Everyone had a good time doing those line dance things where you "slide to the left" and "kick it" and "walk it by yourself" or something like that. And no one did anything even slightly shady...well, unless you count when Luke ACCIDENTALLY backed into someone he shouldn’t have. But these things happen on a crowded dance floor and maybe that’s what my mother was worried about. But the point is, it seemed like good clean fun at the time. And definitely no worse than that Hokey-Pokey number we did at the skating rink when we were kids...with our mom’s full blessing.
PARTING IS SUCH SWEET SORROW: All good things must come to an end...and so it goes with all wedding series blog posts. Ha ha. I’m just kidding. I meant that the actual wedding was the GOOD THING that had to come to an end. So the bouquet was tossed (to my Emily I might add) and the garter was slung (I didn’t register to whom), and the HC were sent off in a shower of sparks from a sparkler-wielding crowd. And I seem to recall even a fireworks display...unless I’m confusing the wedding with our 4th of July outing several weeks later. But I don’t think I am. Because I think my 14-year-old son was one of the lighters of the fireworks and I hope that wasn’t some kind of illegal activity, but it’s a little too late to worry about that now.
LOVE AND A LITTLE BIT MORE: According to the Beatles...or maybe Lynden David Hall...All you Need is Love. I think that song played at some point during the wedding which is why I’m mentioning it here. And while it’s a nice sentiment, it’s not really true of course. In the case of this wedding, in addition to a goodly amount of love, Ben and Courtney needed a truly gorgeous venue, an army of family and friends, and some tasty donuts and snow cones, among other things, to make their special day come together.
DREAM SEQUENCES IN GENERAL: Several winters ago, Luke and Amanda made a car trip to Kansas during which the following three things happened simultaneously:
1. A gentle snow was falling,
2. A Christmas song was playing on the radio, AND
3. They spotted some deer frolicking (their word, not mine) in a field by the side of the road.
Each of the individual elements of this moment was nice, but they called the combination a "dream sequence". Shortly thereafter, as we are wont to do, our family began to not only overuse that phrase, but we also tended to misapply it. I mean it’s nice to find a forgotten toothpick in your purse right after a chips and salsa binge at Ranchito, but I think we can all agree it doesn’t qualify as a Dream Sequence.
DREAM SEQUENCES, SPECIFICALLY: So I hope no one will accuse me of being trite when I say that this particular wedding weekend qualified as being the ultimate in Dream Sequences. Because all the elements certainly combined to make it one. Which is nice because the problem with weddings for people like Ben and Courtney is that there probably won’t be any do-overs. They needed to get it right the first time, and I think they succeeded. And now we just get to wait and see what the future holds for the HC. And which side of the family the future little Hawleys will resemble the most. My bet must be with the Hawley side because they seem to have some dominant features. Courtney probably didn’t think about that when she said yes to Ben. And I for one am glad she didn’t.
So that concludes my tale of one wedding. I truly hope that I am not another Harper Lee. You know she only published the one novel (To Kill a Mockingbird) and the success of it so overwhelmed her that she never wrote another. But I don’t think that will happen to me. No matter how popular my first wedding series happens to be (and I know for a fact that at least 5 people waited anxiously for each installment), I am still committed to giving you the story of the Betsy/Thomas nuptials.
But for now, I must take a short break from weddings in general and give you some family news. So looking ahead, here are the titles of some of my next few blog posts which have been preempted by the wedding series:
1. My Jumbo-Sized Summer Vacation
2. The Wreck of the Jeep Liberty
3. The Pumpkin-Whisperer (revisited)
4. A More Efficient Way to Read a Classic, like The Fountainhead
If those titles don’t bring you back for more, I don’t know what will.
We were invited to a fish fry for lunch today...and not only was the fish PERFECT in every way, but the side dishes brought by the other guests were scrumptious as well. I made that lovely sweet coleslaw with whipping cream, but first I had to call around to get the recipe because my Haven Cookbook has gone MISSING. I don’t cook much so I tend to misplace recipes now and again. But I think this might be the first time I’ve lost a whole cookbook. To make matters worse, after the fish fry I went to pick up my dish, and it had turned up missing too. I’m sure the missing cookbook has nothing to do with the missing coleslaw, but it’s disturbing all the same. Because I was looking forwarding to eating the leftover slaw.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 11 of 12
The Reception
LET THE PARTY BEGIN: As mentioned before, the reception was in Courtney’s backyard, so we all just moseyed on back there after the ceremony. It would have been slightly more convenient if Brent and Kim (parents of the bride) had installed RV hookups in that pasture west of their house...and then we all could have brought our pop-ups and trailers and suchlike and we wouldn’t have had to leave the grounds the entire wedding weekend. But no one can be expected to think of everything. Anyway, the point is that no one got lost getting to the reception. And that’s always a positive.
THE SIMPLE LIFE: I don’t think I told you this before, but Courtney spent 7 months of her engagement to Ben in Zambia, Africa, working with Ben’s sister (and my niece) Meagan at an orphanage. She came back determined to have a "simple" wedding, without a lot of fuss or money thrown into it. I think she accomplished her goal, but without it being obvious to the casual observer. Because again, everything looked elegant and beautiful.
THE ELEMENTS: Of course, it helped that we were still outside. Because shortly after the reception began, the sun set and soon thereafter strings of twinkle lights along the fences lit up the night. Lavender candles and framed pictures of the HC (happy couple) adorned the tables, and clusters of purple and white balloons here and there added a festive touch as well. In the midst of the tables was a portable dance floor, gleaming and ready for action. And the music filling the air was a mix of favorite songs of the HC which had been uploaded to an ipod and plugged into a rather decent sound system.
THE SUGAR FEST: And now we get to the food, glorious food. As alluded to earlier, yes, they served donuts at the wedding reception...along with snow cones. And as if that weren’t enough to send my twin cousins that "have the diabetes" into glucose overload, they also served the more conventional wedding cake. Oh, and then there was the chocolate fountain...with a nice assortment of foodstuffs to dip in said fountain. Like marshmallows and strawberries and other things I can’t remember. Oh I popped over to Facebook to see if my pictures could refresh my memory on this point, but unfortunately I don’t recognize what’s on the plates I photographed. Worrisome, I know, but who really cares at this point anyway? Most of us are now thinking only about what they might be serving Friday night at Thomas and Betsy’s reception.
Oops. I guess I will have to squeeze The Dance into the FINAL INSTALLMENT along with the wrap-up and concluding remarks. It won't be pretty. But it will be finished.
For lunch, I went to the Chinese restaurant with my co-workers. And I didn't overeat which might be a first for me at an all-you-can-eat buffet. My personal trainer will be so proud.
LET THE PARTY BEGIN: As mentioned before, the reception was in Courtney’s backyard, so we all just moseyed on back there after the ceremony. It would have been slightly more convenient if Brent and Kim (parents of the bride) had installed RV hookups in that pasture west of their house...and then we all could have brought our pop-ups and trailers and suchlike and we wouldn’t have had to leave the grounds the entire wedding weekend. But no one can be expected to think of everything. Anyway, the point is that no one got lost getting to the reception. And that’s always a positive.
THE SIMPLE LIFE: I don’t think I told you this before, but Courtney spent 7 months of her engagement to Ben in Zambia, Africa, working with Ben’s sister (and my niece) Meagan at an orphanage. She came back determined to have a "simple" wedding, without a lot of fuss or money thrown into it. I think she accomplished her goal, but without it being obvious to the casual observer. Because again, everything looked elegant and beautiful.
THE ELEMENTS: Of course, it helped that we were still outside. Because shortly after the reception began, the sun set and soon thereafter strings of twinkle lights along the fences lit up the night. Lavender candles and framed pictures of the HC (happy couple) adorned the tables, and clusters of purple and white balloons here and there added a festive touch as well. In the midst of the tables was a portable dance floor, gleaming and ready for action. And the music filling the air was a mix of favorite songs of the HC which had been uploaded to an ipod and plugged into a rather decent sound system.
THE SUGAR FEST: And now we get to the food, glorious food. As alluded to earlier, yes, they served donuts at the wedding reception...along with snow cones. And as if that weren’t enough to send my twin cousins that "have the diabetes" into glucose overload, they also served the more conventional wedding cake. Oh, and then there was the chocolate fountain...with a nice assortment of foodstuffs to dip in said fountain. Like marshmallows and strawberries and other things I can’t remember. Oh I popped over to Facebook to see if my pictures could refresh my memory on this point, but unfortunately I don’t recognize what’s on the plates I photographed. Worrisome, I know, but who really cares at this point anyway? Most of us are now thinking only about what they might be serving Friday night at Thomas and Betsy’s reception.
Oops. I guess I will have to squeeze The Dance into the FINAL INSTALLMENT along with the wrap-up and concluding remarks. It won't be pretty. But it will be finished.
For lunch, I went to the Chinese restaurant with my co-workers. And I didn't overeat which might be a first for me at an all-you-can-eat buffet. My personal trainer will be so proud.
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 10 of no more than 12
At this point some of you may be thinking...enough already about Ben and Courtney, let’s talk about Thomas and Betsy. And I admit I’ve been tempted to end this train-wreck of first wedding series with a jaunty, "and they lived happily ever after even though it’s only been two months so far." And this would be quite normal for me because I honestly don’t mind quitting in the middle of a project. In fact, one time I started making a list of my unfinished projects...and never finished it of course. But for whatever reason, I feel a deep and abiding commitment to finish this series properly. So here we go again...
THE OFFICIANT: As I mentioned in an earlier installment (but who among you could possibly remember that far back???) Ben’s brother, Zach, was the officiant at the wedding. I think I started this family tradition almost 23 years ago when my brother Bill presided at my wedding. I don’t remember anything he said, but I’m sure it was humorous, insightful and personal, and probably legal to boot. Zach wore a pink shirt and was the candle lighter in my wedding. And although he was only 9 years old at the time, I think he must have learned a thing or two from his old Uncle Bill. Because we all agreed that his remarks at Ben and Courtney’s wedding were positively eloquent. Of course, right now I can only recall a couple of things he said. One was about how Ben liked to wear girls’ clothes when he was younger, and another was about how Courtney liked to hoard food. Oh, and he referred to my sister (his mother) as the Simon Cowell of weddings, which was a slight exaggeration of course. But in the end, the two were joined in holy matrimony. Or as Luke would have said...their water of singleness was turned into the wine of oneness. And it was all good.
THE VOWS: A final note on the ceremony. The vows Ben and Courtney said to each other were the same ones recited by Ben’s paternal grandparents at their wedding many years ago. Those formal and somewhat solemn vows put a beautiful seal on the otherwise lighthearted tone of the wedding ceremony. They were a gentle reminder to us all that this occasion was not about love songs or pretty dresses or flowers, but about the serious and life changing promises being made by two people to each other.
THE RECESSION: Obviously, I am not referring to the economy here. Not only because we’re discussing a wedding, but also because economics confuse me and therefore I will more than likely never blog about that topic. Anyway, of course I’m referring to the receding of the wedding party back down the aisle. The recession song was How Sweet it is to be Loved by You which was a good choice because who doesn’t like James Taylor? Even though his Steamroller song is of course trashy. But no one’s perfect. And besides, the song actually FORESHADOWED one of the reception elements. Yes, folks. You know, towards the end when it says, "It’s like jelly to the donut" (to be loved by you)...well, guess what they served at the reception? Coincidence? I think not.
So now I must close because I am saving The Reception for Part 11...and then The Wrap-Up for Part 12. Following those posts, I will of course be catching you up with the family doings, including the scintillating details of Emily’s departure. Which was a piece of cake. Seriously. I haven’t cried at all...and now I’m wondering if I’m even human. But that post will have to wait.
I had T&WT for lunch today.
THE OFFICIANT: As I mentioned in an earlier installment (but who among you could possibly remember that far back???) Ben’s brother, Zach, was the officiant at the wedding. I think I started this family tradition almost 23 years ago when my brother Bill presided at my wedding. I don’t remember anything he said, but I’m sure it was humorous, insightful and personal, and probably legal to boot. Zach wore a pink shirt and was the candle lighter in my wedding. And although he was only 9 years old at the time, I think he must have learned a thing or two from his old Uncle Bill. Because we all agreed that his remarks at Ben and Courtney’s wedding were positively eloquent. Of course, right now I can only recall a couple of things he said. One was about how Ben liked to wear girls’ clothes when he was younger, and another was about how Courtney liked to hoard food. Oh, and he referred to my sister (his mother) as the Simon Cowell of weddings, which was a slight exaggeration of course. But in the end, the two were joined in holy matrimony. Or as Luke would have said...their water of singleness was turned into the wine of oneness. And it was all good.
THE VOWS: A final note on the ceremony. The vows Ben and Courtney said to each other were the same ones recited by Ben’s paternal grandparents at their wedding many years ago. Those formal and somewhat solemn vows put a beautiful seal on the otherwise lighthearted tone of the wedding ceremony. They were a gentle reminder to us all that this occasion was not about love songs or pretty dresses or flowers, but about the serious and life changing promises being made by two people to each other.
THE RECESSION: Obviously, I am not referring to the economy here. Not only because we’re discussing a wedding, but also because economics confuse me and therefore I will more than likely never blog about that topic. Anyway, of course I’m referring to the receding of the wedding party back down the aisle. The recession song was How Sweet it is to be Loved by You which was a good choice because who doesn’t like James Taylor? Even though his Steamroller song is of course trashy. But no one’s perfect. And besides, the song actually FORESHADOWED one of the reception elements. Yes, folks. You know, towards the end when it says, "It’s like jelly to the donut" (to be loved by you)...well, guess what they served at the reception? Coincidence? I think not.
So now I must close because I am saving The Reception for Part 11...and then The Wrap-Up for Part 12. Following those posts, I will of course be catching you up with the family doings, including the scintillating details of Emily’s departure. Which was a piece of cake. Seriously. I haven’t cried at all...and now I’m wondering if I’m even human. But that post will have to wait.
I had T&WT for lunch today.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
MOMMIE DEAREST
Again, I must interrupt the Wedding Series for an unimportant update. Please bear with me.
Emily and Rachel have begun the de-Emily-fication process of their room. Could I put that a more depressing way? Probably not. But that’s what it feels like because they are systematically removing all traces of her from the room. Anyway, they share a lot of clothes so decisions have to be made about what stays with Rachel and what goes with Emily. The first night went surprisingly well. They only argued over who HAD to take clothes that neither of them liked. The next night was less amicable. Rachel was "difficult" according to Emily, and wouldn’t tell her what she wanted. Rachel defended herself by saying she was just sad. I popped in and out of the room trying to defuse the situation by making accusations such as, "Why don’t you ever wear that cute dress?" and "Is there really a tag still on that skirt?"
Last night Rachel picked out the movie we watched off of Emily’s summer movie list. It was Billboard Dad...perhaps the cheesiest Olsen twin movie ever made. And I rolled my eyes but let them play it. Emily suggested Mighty Joe Young instead, but I said I didn’t like movies about gorillas. Then she offered Summer of the Monkeys, and I had to admit I don’t like movies about ANY primates. I hope that doesn’t make me a bad person.
David has started football workouts and thinks that exempts him from doing anything around the house. But he did make me some cotton candy last night.
Dave has brought in so much produce that I have been forced to boycott the kitchen. I feel overwhelmed when I can’t find one inch of counter space.
As for me, it seems that Emily’s college is interested in having me write a parent blog for them. I thought about asking Emily if she minded, but decided against it. Honestly, I don’t know why I’m worried about getting my children’s stamp of approval on what I tell the world. Most of the time, I make a conscious effort to present them in a positive light. But sometimes something they do or say is so funny or strange that I throw caution to the wind and post it even though a tiny amount of public humiliation may follow. This is called collateral damage, and should be perfectly acceptable if the related incident is funny enough, don’t you agree?
But the whole parent blog thing did start me thinking that someday my children might want to sell the sordid story of their upbringing to Lifetime. It will be about a mother who abused her children by blogging about them, revealing all their idiosyncracies for public consumption. Of course Faye Dunaway would be perfect to play me, the evil mother, but is she still alive? If not, they could probably get that frumpy actress who was so deliciously sadistic in that movie with James Caan. I can’t remember her name.
Incidentally, I handled a case one time where one of the parties did such strange things that another party involved thought he might be able to sell the story to Lifetime. He asked me who I would want to play me in the movie and I immediately said Meryl Streep. Wasn’t she the one who delivered the greatest movie line of all time ("A dingo ate my baby") with that strong Australian accent? Who wouldn’t want her? Of course, no dingos would be involved in our movie and she would have to say boring stuff like, "Yes Judge, I’ll prepare that Journal Entry" and "Could you forward that email to me?" so maybe Meryl wouldn’t be interested.
I had the same old, same old for lunch today. Plus a peach off our tree.
Emily and Rachel have begun the de-Emily-fication process of their room. Could I put that a more depressing way? Probably not. But that’s what it feels like because they are systematically removing all traces of her from the room. Anyway, they share a lot of clothes so decisions have to be made about what stays with Rachel and what goes with Emily. The first night went surprisingly well. They only argued over who HAD to take clothes that neither of them liked. The next night was less amicable. Rachel was "difficult" according to Emily, and wouldn’t tell her what she wanted. Rachel defended herself by saying she was just sad. I popped in and out of the room trying to defuse the situation by making accusations such as, "Why don’t you ever wear that cute dress?" and "Is there really a tag still on that skirt?"
Last night Rachel picked out the movie we watched off of Emily’s summer movie list. It was Billboard Dad...perhaps the cheesiest Olsen twin movie ever made. And I rolled my eyes but let them play it. Emily suggested Mighty Joe Young instead, but I said I didn’t like movies about gorillas. Then she offered Summer of the Monkeys, and I had to admit I don’t like movies about ANY primates. I hope that doesn’t make me a bad person.
David has started football workouts and thinks that exempts him from doing anything around the house. But he did make me some cotton candy last night.
Dave has brought in so much produce that I have been forced to boycott the kitchen. I feel overwhelmed when I can’t find one inch of counter space.
As for me, it seems that Emily’s college is interested in having me write a parent blog for them. I thought about asking Emily if she minded, but decided against it. Honestly, I don’t know why I’m worried about getting my children’s stamp of approval on what I tell the world. Most of the time, I make a conscious effort to present them in a positive light. But sometimes something they do or say is so funny or strange that I throw caution to the wind and post it even though a tiny amount of public humiliation may follow. This is called collateral damage, and should be perfectly acceptable if the related incident is funny enough, don’t you agree?
But the whole parent blog thing did start me thinking that someday my children might want to sell the sordid story of their upbringing to Lifetime. It will be about a mother who abused her children by blogging about them, revealing all their idiosyncracies for public consumption. Of course Faye Dunaway would be perfect to play me, the evil mother, but is she still alive? If not, they could probably get that frumpy actress who was so deliciously sadistic in that movie with James Caan. I can’t remember her name.
Incidentally, I handled a case one time where one of the parties did such strange things that another party involved thought he might be able to sell the story to Lifetime. He asked me who I would want to play me in the movie and I immediately said Meryl Streep. Wasn’t she the one who delivered the greatest movie line of all time ("A dingo ate my baby") with that strong Australian accent? Who wouldn’t want her? Of course, no dingos would be involved in our movie and she would have to say boring stuff like, "Yes Judge, I’ll prepare that Journal Entry" and "Could you forward that email to me?" so maybe Meryl wouldn’t be interested.
I had the same old, same old for lunch today. Plus a peach off our tree.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 9 of I think 12
NOW LET’S SEE...WHERE WAS I?
Oh yeah...
THE TWO-RING-CIRCUS: Don’t you hate that part of a wedding when the beautiful bride is being escorted down the aisle on the arm of her proud father, and the handsome groom is gazing down the aisle watching their approach, and you have to decide which way to look so you won’t miss anything? Okay, I don’t really hate it...but it definitely stresses me. And yes, I have always hated circuses for the same reason. In fact, I hate circuses even more than zoos...but this post is not about that. This post is about a bride and a groom who finally came together to say I do.
HERE COMES THE BRIDE: So...finally...we hear the first strains of Canon in D and Rachel said later those strains were a bit shaky, but no one seemed to notice or care. Because the bride and her dad were making their way down the aisle at last. Now Courtney is a pretty, pretty girl to start off with...but on this evening she looked positively RADIANT, what with that added happiness stuff, not to mention her nice even tan. Her father, Brent, probably looked nice too but seriously I only had time to look at Courtney and then at Ben and then at Courtney and then at Ben and then...well, you get the picture.
THE DRESS: The dress was a modern a-line gown with elegant hand-beaded floral lace details along a breakfront skirt and bodice. Haha. I made that up. I have no idea what style it was. Hmm...but it did seem to have a lot of lace. And at some point shortly before the wedding, I noticed that one of those hanger straps was peeking out from its place INSIDE the dress. And I pointed it out to Courtney...so pretty much I saved the day there. But I hate to toot my own horn, so let’s forge on, shall we?
THE HAND-OFF: One of my nieces informed me recently that John Mayer has some personal issues...and is basically not a nice person. But he sure can sing. And can’t I admire his music...just like you might admire Frank Lloyd Wright’s amazing buildings even though he was a scoundrel? Anyway, the point is I was reminded of that "Daughters" song while Brent was making the hand-off of his little girl to Ben. Because I think Courtney has definitely put the color inside of Ben’s world. If all that whispering they do to each other is any gauge.
Oh my...time does get away from me. I do hate to quit but I need to get home. You must understand that we take Emily to school in 9 short days, and I’m feeling some pressure here. Besides the laundry lessons...which we’ve had to break up into mini-sessions...I’m just remembering that she doesn’t know how to pump gas and I don’t think I’ve ever told her what to do when a funeral procession goes by.
For lunch today, I ate some tiny little crumbs of Wheat Thins with my tuna. Because I didn’t have time to go to the store because I had court this afternoon. See, I do work sometimes.
Oh yeah...
THE TWO-RING-CIRCUS: Don’t you hate that part of a wedding when the beautiful bride is being escorted down the aisle on the arm of her proud father, and the handsome groom is gazing down the aisle watching their approach, and you have to decide which way to look so you won’t miss anything? Okay, I don’t really hate it...but it definitely stresses me. And yes, I have always hated circuses for the same reason. In fact, I hate circuses even more than zoos...but this post is not about that. This post is about a bride and a groom who finally came together to say I do.
HERE COMES THE BRIDE: So...finally...we hear the first strains of Canon in D and Rachel said later those strains were a bit shaky, but no one seemed to notice or care. Because the bride and her dad were making their way down the aisle at last. Now Courtney is a pretty, pretty girl to start off with...but on this evening she looked positively RADIANT, what with that added happiness stuff, not to mention her nice even tan. Her father, Brent, probably looked nice too but seriously I only had time to look at Courtney and then at Ben and then at Courtney and then at Ben and then...well, you get the picture.
THE DRESS: The dress was a modern a-line gown with elegant hand-beaded floral lace details along a breakfront skirt and bodice. Haha. I made that up. I have no idea what style it was. Hmm...but it did seem to have a lot of lace. And at some point shortly before the wedding, I noticed that one of those hanger straps was peeking out from its place INSIDE the dress. And I pointed it out to Courtney...so pretty much I saved the day there. But I hate to toot my own horn, so let’s forge on, shall we?
THE HAND-OFF: One of my nieces informed me recently that John Mayer has some personal issues...and is basically not a nice person. But he sure can sing. And can’t I admire his music...just like you might admire Frank Lloyd Wright’s amazing buildings even though he was a scoundrel? Anyway, the point is I was reminded of that "Daughters" song while Brent was making the hand-off of his little girl to Ben. Because I think Courtney has definitely put the color inside of Ben’s world. If all that whispering they do to each other is any gauge.
Oh my...time does get away from me. I do hate to quit but I need to get home. You must understand that we take Emily to school in 9 short days, and I’m feeling some pressure here. Besides the laundry lessons...which we’ve had to break up into mini-sessions...I’m just remembering that she doesn’t know how to pump gas and I don’t think I’ve ever told her what to do when a funeral procession goes by.
For lunch today, I ate some tiny little crumbs of Wheat Thins with my tuna. Because I didn’t have time to go to the store because I had court this afternoon. See, I do work sometimes.
Monday, August 9, 2010
BACK TO KANSAS...GOOD OLD KANSAS
I'm finally home from my 12-day, 3500 mile, vacation marathon...which means that my blogging hiatus will soon be at an end. But not tonight because I'm tired. I would have blogged on the mondo-vacation but Planner Paul kept us on a tight schedule of activities such as rafting, caving, beachcombing, sightseeing and ballgaming. I will be sparing you most of the gory details of this vacation...because I like you. But someday I'll regale you with a few highlights.
Speaking of tight schedules, I also wanted to let you know that I plan to wind up the Ben&Courtney Wedding Series shortly, hopefully before our next family wedding which is on the 27th.
Meanwhile, I have to run home now and teach Emily how to do laundry.
For lunch today, I had a turkey sandwich on sourdough bread at the coffee shop. Ho hum. But then for supper, I had a garden vegetable stir-fry and sliced peaches, all from our very own backyard.
Speaking of tight schedules, I also wanted to let you know that I plan to wind up the Ben&Courtney Wedding Series shortly, hopefully before our next family wedding which is on the 27th.
Meanwhile, I have to run home now and teach Emily how to do laundry.
For lunch today, I had a turkey sandwich on sourdough bread at the coffee shop. Ho hum. But then for supper, I had a garden vegetable stir-fry and sliced peaches, all from our very own backyard.
Saturday, July 24, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 8 of I think 12
THE PROCESSION BEGINS
WE HAVE LIFT-OFF: Have you ever watched one of those NASA rocket launches on TV? You know, where the preliminary stuff seems interminable, and you wonder if they’ll EVER get to the countdown, but you sit through it just to finally see that glorious launch and hear them say "we have lift-off"? Well I feel like it’s been a similar journey throughout this wedding series, but now I’m happy to report that we’re through with the preliminaries ...and moving on to the glorious main event! And I’m also happy to report that the wedding was NOT scuttled...like some launches are. And I would like to take this time to thank you for your patience and perseverance...and for not waiting in hopes that an abridged version of this wedding series would be released.
MEET THE PARENTS: So first off, and as usual, came the seating of the grandparents and parents. I think Courtney’s brother Grant escorted his mom down the aisle and of course Ben escorted his parents. Then there had to be so much hugging before everyone either sat down or took their places. And it wouldn’t have been so bad but I think that’s when they were playing that Matthew West song When I Say I Do. You can listen to this beautiful song on YouTube, and picture those proud parents and grandparents coming down the aisle looking oh so happy, but maybe a bit reflective too. But this might make you cry. So if you would rather not cry, you can just make up a tune and sing the song yourself (lyrics below) and chances are this will NOT make you cry. Unless of course, you have a decent voice AND know the song...and in that case you might make yourself cry. But that won’t be my fault (Luke).
WHEN I SAY I DO
There must be a God, I believe it’s true
cause I can see his love when I look at you.
And he must have a plan
for this crazy life
cause he brought you here
and placed you by my side.
CHORUS:
Cause I have never been so sure of anything before
Like I am in this moment here with you.
Now for better or for worse
are so much more than only words.
And I pray everyday will be the proof
that I mean what I say when I say I do,
yeah I mean what I say when I say I do.
You see these hands you hold will always hold you up
When the strength you have just ain’t strong enough.
And what tomorrow brings only time will tell
But I will stand by you in sickness and in health.
CHORUS
BRIDGE:
Take my hand and take this ring
and know that I will always love you through anything
As the years march on
like a beating heart
I will live these words
‘til death do us part.
CHORUS
PRETTY MAIDS ALL IN A ROW: Next came the bridesmaids and groomsmen down the aisle...two by two. And I wish I had some drama to relate here but everyone looked good and seemed happy and no one tripped so I’ve got nothing.
THE LITTLE ONES: Then came Nora in a sweet little lavender dress with white trim and Bennett in a purple striped button-down shirt and his Converse tennis shoes. They held hands and Bennett was clearly leading Nora along, but he had his free hand over his face at all times...so of course we couldn’t see him. Clearly the most comical moment of the procession...and one of the sweetest.
And here comes the bride will have to wait until next time...because I have to go home and greet David who just got home from camp. Well, really, I’m not going to greet him so much as lecture him because he went straight to a friend’s house and hung out for awhile before we made him come home. Poor guy.
And I had a turkey sandwich and chips for lunch.
WE HAVE LIFT-OFF: Have you ever watched one of those NASA rocket launches on TV? You know, where the preliminary stuff seems interminable, and you wonder if they’ll EVER get to the countdown, but you sit through it just to finally see that glorious launch and hear them say "we have lift-off"? Well I feel like it’s been a similar journey throughout this wedding series, but now I’m happy to report that we’re through with the preliminaries ...and moving on to the glorious main event! And I’m also happy to report that the wedding was NOT scuttled...like some launches are. And I would like to take this time to thank you for your patience and perseverance...and for not waiting in hopes that an abridged version of this wedding series would be released.
MEET THE PARENTS: So first off, and as usual, came the seating of the grandparents and parents. I think Courtney’s brother Grant escorted his mom down the aisle and of course Ben escorted his parents. Then there had to be so much hugging before everyone either sat down or took their places. And it wouldn’t have been so bad but I think that’s when they were playing that Matthew West song When I Say I Do. You can listen to this beautiful song on YouTube, and picture those proud parents and grandparents coming down the aisle looking oh so happy, but maybe a bit reflective too. But this might make you cry. So if you would rather not cry, you can just make up a tune and sing the song yourself (lyrics below) and chances are this will NOT make you cry. Unless of course, you have a decent voice AND know the song...and in that case you might make yourself cry. But that won’t be my fault (Luke).
WHEN I SAY I DO
There must be a God, I believe it’s true
cause I can see his love when I look at you.
And he must have a plan
for this crazy life
cause he brought you here
and placed you by my side.
CHORUS:
Cause I have never been so sure of anything before
Like I am in this moment here with you.
Now for better or for worse
are so much more than only words.
And I pray everyday will be the proof
that I mean what I say when I say I do,
yeah I mean what I say when I say I do.
You see these hands you hold will always hold you up
When the strength you have just ain’t strong enough.
And what tomorrow brings only time will tell
But I will stand by you in sickness and in health.
CHORUS
BRIDGE:
Take my hand and take this ring
and know that I will always love you through anything
As the years march on
like a beating heart
I will live these words
‘til death do us part.
CHORUS
PRETTY MAIDS ALL IN A ROW: Next came the bridesmaids and groomsmen down the aisle...two by two. And I wish I had some drama to relate here but everyone looked good and seemed happy and no one tripped so I’ve got nothing.
THE LITTLE ONES: Then came Nora in a sweet little lavender dress with white trim and Bennett in a purple striped button-down shirt and his Converse tennis shoes. They held hands and Bennett was clearly leading Nora along, but he had his free hand over his face at all times...so of course we couldn’t see him. Clearly the most comical moment of the procession...and one of the sweetest.
And here comes the bride will have to wait until next time...because I have to go home and greet David who just got home from camp. Well, really, I’m not going to greet him so much as lecture him because he went straight to a friend’s house and hung out for awhile before we made him come home. Poor guy.
And I had a turkey sandwich and chips for lunch.
Thursday, July 22, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 7 of who knows how many?
THE CEREMONY - Well...almost.
THE COOL-DOWN: The guest reception table was ably manned by a small army of the groom’s cousins. Emily and Abbie greeted the guests, asked everyone to sign the picture frame, and handed out the programs...which were cleverly printed on fans with sweet lavender bows tied to the handles. Meanwhile, next to the guest table were two good-sized buckets of ice filled with bottled water which David and David Paul toweled dry and handed to the arriving guests. This was the first time I’d been to a wedding where I was offered cooling agents before I sat down...but it made me feel like a pampered guest at an exclusive resort...so I liked it.
THE WARM-UP: So the story, as I understand it, goes something like this. A few months before the wedding, Ben and Courtney have no music planned for the event. But then this guy named Trevor moves into the house where Ben lives...and lo and behold, he’s a pretty decent guitarist. So naturally Ben and Courtney say...hey would you play some songs to warm up the crowd before our wedding...and he says yes. Then at some point they remember that Rachel can play violin...so they ask if she’ll do Canon in D with this guy for the procession. And she says yes...and so they think they’ve got everything covered. But then at some point (perhaps the night of the wedding), it becomes clear to at least one person that an additional singer might come in handy...for harmonizing of course...and fortunately one of the groomsmen was able to step up to the plate. And that’s how the wedding music came to be, folks.
THE VOCAL STYLINGS OF TREVOR AND COLE: So while we were busy trying to stay cool, the musicians were told to WARM UP that crowd. And that’s what they did. They sang and played a selection of those breezy, crazy-in-love songs...perfect for any warm summer evening but especially this one...with love in the air. Of course, it doesn’t pay to analyze the words of those songs too much. I find myself wondering what kind of guy would "sit and stare" while some girl "thoughtfully thumbs through her hair." And what kind of girl would fall for a guy who "sits there slack-jawed with nothing to say". But when Stephen Speaks sings those words...or even two random guys like Trevor and Cole...somehow we don’t see it as two young lovers who act like idiots. We just believe in the sappy, happy ending. Or the sappy, happy beginning...in this case...
Oops. My time's up and once again, I have to quit just when things are beginning to get interesting. I bet I could write soap operas...if I had a mind to. But I better get this wedding series finished first.
I have so much on the family to tell you too, that I’m worried that I’ll never catch up. But I will persevere. I had this chicken and broccoli croissant thing for lunch, which I had to heat up in a little cardboard pocket in the microwave. And it wasn’t the worst thing I’ve ever tasted. I also had some fruit cup. But to make up for that lunch, I had some green beans FROM OUR GARDEN for dinner, with a turkey sandwich, and both were...delectable.
THE COOL-DOWN: The guest reception table was ably manned by a small army of the groom’s cousins. Emily and Abbie greeted the guests, asked everyone to sign the picture frame, and handed out the programs...which were cleverly printed on fans with sweet lavender bows tied to the handles. Meanwhile, next to the guest table were two good-sized buckets of ice filled with bottled water which David and David Paul toweled dry and handed to the arriving guests. This was the first time I’d been to a wedding where I was offered cooling agents before I sat down...but it made me feel like a pampered guest at an exclusive resort...so I liked it.
THE WARM-UP: So the story, as I understand it, goes something like this. A few months before the wedding, Ben and Courtney have no music planned for the event. But then this guy named Trevor moves into the house where Ben lives...and lo and behold, he’s a pretty decent guitarist. So naturally Ben and Courtney say...hey would you play some songs to warm up the crowd before our wedding...and he says yes. Then at some point they remember that Rachel can play violin...so they ask if she’ll do Canon in D with this guy for the procession. And she says yes...and so they think they’ve got everything covered. But then at some point (perhaps the night of the wedding), it becomes clear to at least one person that an additional singer might come in handy...for harmonizing of course...and fortunately one of the groomsmen was able to step up to the plate. And that’s how the wedding music came to be, folks.
THE VOCAL STYLINGS OF TREVOR AND COLE: So while we were busy trying to stay cool, the musicians were told to WARM UP that crowd. And that’s what they did. They sang and played a selection of those breezy, crazy-in-love songs...perfect for any warm summer evening but especially this one...with love in the air. Of course, it doesn’t pay to analyze the words of those songs too much. I find myself wondering what kind of guy would "sit and stare" while some girl "thoughtfully thumbs through her hair." And what kind of girl would fall for a guy who "sits there slack-jawed with nothing to say". But when Stephen Speaks sings those words...or even two random guys like Trevor and Cole...somehow we don’t see it as two young lovers who act like idiots. We just believe in the sappy, happy ending. Or the sappy, happy beginning...in this case...
Oops. My time's up and once again, I have to quit just when things are beginning to get interesting. I bet I could write soap operas...if I had a mind to. But I better get this wedding series finished first.
I have so much on the family to tell you too, that I’m worried that I’ll never catch up. But I will persevere. I had this chicken and broccoli croissant thing for lunch, which I had to heat up in a little cardboard pocket in the microwave. And it wasn’t the worst thing I’ve ever tasted. I also had some fruit cup. But to make up for that lunch, I had some green beans FROM OUR GARDEN for dinner, with a turkey sandwich, and both were...delectable.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 6 of who knows how many?
MORE PRELUDE STUFF
APOLOGY ACCEPTED: We were asked to be out at Courtney’s house by 6 p.m. for pictures. Since the ceremony wasn’t until 7:30, there was some concern that even if we arrived looking fresh and crisp for the pictures, we’d be looking more like so much wilted spinach by actual ceremony time. Because let’s be honest, the great outdoors in Oklahoma is a virtual sauna in June. And I don’t blame Courtney for planning an outdoor wedding then. I blame Ben...because he’s in his crazy-mixed-up-medical-school-days, and thought he’d enjoy his honeymoon more if he didn’t have to spend most of it studying for his boards. He did apologize, and profusely. And naturally we forgave him, and tried to keep our grumbling to a minimum.
DESERT ISLANDS: And at least for me, this "wedding in a sauna" thing turned out to be a good thing. Not only because it allowed me to sweat out all my impurities, but also because it was one of those great EQUALIZER things. Of course the bride and a few others managed to look fresh throughout the night, but the rest of us drooped TOGETHER and bonded...just like fellow survivors of a shipwreck. And here of course I’m thinking of Gilligan’s Island where Kansas farm girl Maryann was able to mingle easily with Hollywood starlet Ginger because they were stranded on a desert island together. In much the same way, I was able to mingle quite easily with those much classier than me because the heat brought them down to my level of grooming. Not that I’m comparing this wedding to a shipwreck...because other than the heat, and maybe one guest who reminded me of the Professor, there really weren’t any other similarities.
THE SET-UP: So you know how when you order fajitas, the waiter first brings you that lovely set-up? A plate full of guacamole and pico de gallo and other goodies? Someone in my family once started eating those accompaniments like it was a salad before his meal...I think it was Zach...and we found that amusing. But the point is that a good set-up always sets a festive mood and prepares you for the sizzling stuff to come. And that’s how it was with the set-up for the wedding. The gates by the road festooned with purple wreaths, the musicians tuning up their instruments, the wedding party bedecked in lavenders and purples all milling about the place. All of this and more provided a festive atmosphere...preparing us for the sizzling wedding ceremony to come. Pun intended, by the way...
And I’m so sorry. I don’t mean to leave you with a cliffhanger...but I have to cut this one short. My family calls and I must answer. For lunch today, I had a special treat. I was in Wichita for a doctor’s appointment (which I will tell you about later, you lucky dogs you) and met my sister Susan at Five Guys and a Burger...or is it just Five Guys Burgers?...something like that anyway. And we had burgers and fries...and they were great...but the company was the BEST.
APOLOGY ACCEPTED: We were asked to be out at Courtney’s house by 6 p.m. for pictures. Since the ceremony wasn’t until 7:30, there was some concern that even if we arrived looking fresh and crisp for the pictures, we’d be looking more like so much wilted spinach by actual ceremony time. Because let’s be honest, the great outdoors in Oklahoma is a virtual sauna in June. And I don’t blame Courtney for planning an outdoor wedding then. I blame Ben...because he’s in his crazy-mixed-up-medical-school-days, and thought he’d enjoy his honeymoon more if he didn’t have to spend most of it studying for his boards. He did apologize, and profusely. And naturally we forgave him, and tried to keep our grumbling to a minimum.
DESERT ISLANDS: And at least for me, this "wedding in a sauna" thing turned out to be a good thing. Not only because it allowed me to sweat out all my impurities, but also because it was one of those great EQUALIZER things. Of course the bride and a few others managed to look fresh throughout the night, but the rest of us drooped TOGETHER and bonded...just like fellow survivors of a shipwreck. And here of course I’m thinking of Gilligan’s Island where Kansas farm girl Maryann was able to mingle easily with Hollywood starlet Ginger because they were stranded on a desert island together. In much the same way, I was able to mingle quite easily with those much classier than me because the heat brought them down to my level of grooming. Not that I’m comparing this wedding to a shipwreck...because other than the heat, and maybe one guest who reminded me of the Professor, there really weren’t any other similarities.
THE SET-UP: So you know how when you order fajitas, the waiter first brings you that lovely set-up? A plate full of guacamole and pico de gallo and other goodies? Someone in my family once started eating those accompaniments like it was a salad before his meal...I think it was Zach...and we found that amusing. But the point is that a good set-up always sets a festive mood and prepares you for the sizzling stuff to come. And that’s how it was with the set-up for the wedding. The gates by the road festooned with purple wreaths, the musicians tuning up their instruments, the wedding party bedecked in lavenders and purples all milling about the place. All of this and more provided a festive atmosphere...preparing us for the sizzling wedding ceremony to come. Pun intended, by the way...
And I’m so sorry. I don’t mean to leave you with a cliffhanger...but I have to cut this one short. My family calls and I must answer. For lunch today, I had a special treat. I was in Wichita for a doctor’s appointment (which I will tell you about later, you lucky dogs you) and met my sister Susan at Five Guys and a Burger...or is it just Five Guys Burgers?...something like that anyway. And we had burgers and fries...and they were great...but the company was the BEST.
Saturday, July 17, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 5 of at least 7
PRELUDE TO A WEDDING
MATCHING TANK TOPS: I would welcome a guest blogger to jump in here with all the intimate details of Saturday morning at the bride’s house and/or at the groomsmen’s golf outing. My first sighting of the wedding party was early afternoon at the church building where Courtney’s family attends. Everyone had gathered there for lunch, but the bride and bridesmaids were also planning to get ready for the wedding in the spacious comfort of the church’s "living room". I was pleased to see that the bridesmaids were wearing matching tank tops because then I could stop wondering who was in the wedding and who was just a random cousin or whatnot. It’s important to know these things so while you’re trying to make small-talk you don’t say to a girl...oh, what did the bridesmaids do last night?...and have them give you a sad look and reply...I wouldn’t know. Because that’s embarrassing.
THE FAIRY GODMOTHER: So the already pretty girls spent the next few hours transforming themselves and each other into knock-out bridesmaids...worthy of deflecting all those evil spirits which people used to think attended weddings to prey on brides. As usual, the wedding party beauty salon was presided over by my nephew Zach’s wife, Haley. Not only is she a professional but she’s basically our family’s own personal fairy godmother. Because with the right product and hair appliance, she can turn any old ash-covered girl into a beautiful Cinderella. So, she comes to these events armed with an impressive array of that product and those hair appliances, and she calmly curls and/or straightens and sprays as many of the bridesmaids as she has time for, but her piece de resistance is always, of course, the BRIDE. Haley's energies and abilities always amaze me, but she obviously can’t get to everyone. So some less fortunate bridesmaids have to be content with the ministrations of fellow bridesmaids. But even for them, Haley always has time for consultations...and is constantly recommending this or that product or this or that tweak. So that in the end, everyone walks out of the room looking...and there's no other word for it...FABULOUS.
PROPORTIONAL HAIRSTYLING: Well...except for me. Obviously, as the aunt of the groom, I wasn’t high on the priority list for beautifying this time. But my niece Katy was wielding a straightener and agreed to "straighten" me. And bless her heart, she worked with relish and considerable skill, and it was all very relaxing. But after she was done, everyone who looked at me either giggled and/or grimaced. And I knew why. See I have this puffy, sort of roundish face. In fact, some years ago shortly after learning the word "porcine", I would ofttimes find that word coming to mind when looking in a mirror. No, don’t feel sorry for me...because I think pigs are kind of cute...in a piggy sort of way. Look at Wilbur on Charlotte’s Web...who couldn’t love a face like that? But my point it that people with puffy round faces should NEVER adopt a flattened hairstyle. Not only does it give you that drowned rat look, but it accentuates your big face and actually makes you look bigger. For the same reason, big women like me know NEVER to carry a small purse. We need BIG purses to go with our bodies. So in the same way, I need a bigger hairstyle. But I do love Katy for trying. She’s precious and nearly perfect in every way.
I’m on my way to the Quinceanera so I have to stop here. In Part 6, we will move into the evening hours and probably even get to the ceremony. Hope springs eternal, doesn’t it?
I had a bowl of leftover fried rice for lunch today. Rachel...in a fit of domesticity...whipped it up last night for our supper. And it was seriously some of the best fried rice I’ve ever tasted, even left over. I asked her how she made it so good and she said she’s just cool like that. So maybe she’s not ready for her own cooking show.
MATCHING TANK TOPS: I would welcome a guest blogger to jump in here with all the intimate details of Saturday morning at the bride’s house and/or at the groomsmen’s golf outing. My first sighting of the wedding party was early afternoon at the church building where Courtney’s family attends. Everyone had gathered there for lunch, but the bride and bridesmaids were also planning to get ready for the wedding in the spacious comfort of the church’s "living room". I was pleased to see that the bridesmaids were wearing matching tank tops because then I could stop wondering who was in the wedding and who was just a random cousin or whatnot. It’s important to know these things so while you’re trying to make small-talk you don’t say to a girl...oh, what did the bridesmaids do last night?...and have them give you a sad look and reply...I wouldn’t know. Because that’s embarrassing.
THE FAIRY GODMOTHER: So the already pretty girls spent the next few hours transforming themselves and each other into knock-out bridesmaids...worthy of deflecting all those evil spirits which people used to think attended weddings to prey on brides. As usual, the wedding party beauty salon was presided over by my nephew Zach’s wife, Haley. Not only is she a professional but she’s basically our family’s own personal fairy godmother. Because with the right product and hair appliance, she can turn any old ash-covered girl into a beautiful Cinderella. So, she comes to these events armed with an impressive array of that product and those hair appliances, and she calmly curls and/or straightens and sprays as many of the bridesmaids as she has time for, but her piece de resistance is always, of course, the BRIDE. Haley's energies and abilities always amaze me, but she obviously can’t get to everyone. So some less fortunate bridesmaids have to be content with the ministrations of fellow bridesmaids. But even for them, Haley always has time for consultations...and is constantly recommending this or that product or this or that tweak. So that in the end, everyone walks out of the room looking...and there's no other word for it...FABULOUS.
PROPORTIONAL HAIRSTYLING: Well...except for me. Obviously, as the aunt of the groom, I wasn’t high on the priority list for beautifying this time. But my niece Katy was wielding a straightener and agreed to "straighten" me. And bless her heart, she worked with relish and considerable skill, and it was all very relaxing. But after she was done, everyone who looked at me either giggled and/or grimaced. And I knew why. See I have this puffy, sort of roundish face. In fact, some years ago shortly after learning the word "porcine", I would ofttimes find that word coming to mind when looking in a mirror. No, don’t feel sorry for me...because I think pigs are kind of cute...in a piggy sort of way. Look at Wilbur on Charlotte’s Web...who couldn’t love a face like that? But my point it that people with puffy round faces should NEVER adopt a flattened hairstyle. Not only does it give you that drowned rat look, but it accentuates your big face and actually makes you look bigger. For the same reason, big women like me know NEVER to carry a small purse. We need BIG purses to go with our bodies. So in the same way, I need a bigger hairstyle. But I do love Katy for trying. She’s precious and nearly perfect in every way.
I’m on my way to the Quinceanera so I have to stop here. In Part 6, we will move into the evening hours and probably even get to the ceremony. Hope springs eternal, doesn’t it?
I had a bowl of leftover fried rice for lunch today. Rachel...in a fit of domesticity...whipped it up last night for our supper. And it was seriously some of the best fried rice I’ve ever tasted, even left over. I asked her how she made it so good and she said she’s just cool like that. So maybe she’s not ready for her own cooking show.
Friday, July 16, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 4 of at least 7
REHEARSAL DINNER - THE AFTERMATH (Part 2)
CORRECTIONS: Before I proceed, I need to make two corrections to my earlier wedding posts. One is that there were nine bridesmaids and nine groomsmen (including the honor attendants) and not eight as previously stated. Again, that’s NINE, and I figured this out on my own. One of my daughters pointed out my other error and not sweetly, I might add. She said it was the BROTHER of the bride who was delusional by saying he couldn’t find anything wrong with Ben. I apologize for any inconvenience caused by these errors.
EVEN LUKE HAD OPTIONS: So after sharing time, we were offered many activity options. Courtney’s dad and/or brother had mowed a pasture and marked the lines for a softball game so most folks headed over there first. I was busy catching up with my long lost aunts and uncles so I didn’t play and thus have no gory details for you. I did hear that they chose up sides the old-fashioned way and I really wish I’d been there to spare anyone else the shame of being picked last. Because that honor always goes to me during any family ball game. And I actually don’t mind because then there are no expectations of me...and so I can quit anytime I feel like it, which is usually after running just once to first base. I also take a lawn chair with me anytime our team takes the field...no sense in wasting my energy pretending I’m ready to catch a fly ball when I’m not. I think these habits of mine somehow disguise my natural athleticism, and thus hurt my chances of getting picked any sooner than last.
EVERYBODY IN THE POOL: Fortunately the pool in Courtney’s backyard was much larger than the motels. Because at some point after the softball game all the people who were young enough not to scare anyone in their swimsuits made their way into the pool for diving exhibitions, pool basketball, or just to cool off. The rest of us sat by the pool visiting and watching the young people at play. Fortunately it was dark by this time, because most of the guys had been golfing that day and had extremely unsightly golf tans.
KNOCK-OUT: Next, those crazy kids headed for the basketball court and played more knock-out games than I could count. There were about 30 people participating and so the competition was extremely tough. And I have no idea who won any of the games so if you are reading this to see your name in lights and get some glory, you will have to get used to disappointment.
FREEWHEELING, FREELOADING AND FOUR-WHEELING: A few guests enjoyed other activities throughout the evening. My husband and several others enjoyed four-wheeling over the grounds until they ran out of gas. When I slipped into the house for a few moments...okay yes, for another Connie’s Cookie...I noticed a couple of people had migrated into the air conditioned house and were watching a sporting event on television. Losers? Or were they just trying to avoid developing a heat rash? Who can say?
HIS AND HERS: Weddings can be such awkward affairs, can’t they? I mean, at times. Because you’re throwing two diverse families together and then sprinkling in his friends and her friends who don’t always know each other. The result is a random assortment of people who may not have much in common. For instance, for this wedding, we had a father of the bride who has a pool in his backyard, and we had a father of the groom who can’t swim. We had a mother of the bride who I suspect only bought one outfit for the wedding, and we had a mother of the groom who bought at least five. One honor attendant spent the last three years as a missionary in Africa, and the other honor attendant spent the last three years in high school. And finally, we had a flower girl who speaks softly and a ring bearer who carries a big stick. So you see, we definitely had our diversities.
ONE BIG HAPPY FAMILY: Which brings me to the real reason the evening was so beautiful, at least to me. It wasn’t the cookies or the sharing or the games. It was the fact that all these different people came together and by the end of the night, we were like one big, happy family. I wish we could have found time to sing "We’re all in this together" (from High School Musical) and perhaps choreograph a dance to go with it. But that wasn’t on the schedule for some reason.
So that’s it for Part 4. Stay tuned for Part 5 because we are heading into the actual Wedding Day! I know I’m excited.
I had a veal cutlet, carrot medallions, and fresh snow peas for lunch. Okay, no. I had tuna and wheat thins.
CORRECTIONS: Before I proceed, I need to make two corrections to my earlier wedding posts. One is that there were nine bridesmaids and nine groomsmen (including the honor attendants) and not eight as previously stated. Again, that’s NINE, and I figured this out on my own. One of my daughters pointed out my other error and not sweetly, I might add. She said it was the BROTHER of the bride who was delusional by saying he couldn’t find anything wrong with Ben. I apologize for any inconvenience caused by these errors.
EVEN LUKE HAD OPTIONS: So after sharing time, we were offered many activity options. Courtney’s dad and/or brother had mowed a pasture and marked the lines for a softball game so most folks headed over there first. I was busy catching up with my long lost aunts and uncles so I didn’t play and thus have no gory details for you. I did hear that they chose up sides the old-fashioned way and I really wish I’d been there to spare anyone else the shame of being picked last. Because that honor always goes to me during any family ball game. And I actually don’t mind because then there are no expectations of me...and so I can quit anytime I feel like it, which is usually after running just once to first base. I also take a lawn chair with me anytime our team takes the field...no sense in wasting my energy pretending I’m ready to catch a fly ball when I’m not. I think these habits of mine somehow disguise my natural athleticism, and thus hurt my chances of getting picked any sooner than last.
EVERYBODY IN THE POOL: Fortunately the pool in Courtney’s backyard was much larger than the motels. Because at some point after the softball game all the people who were young enough not to scare anyone in their swimsuits made their way into the pool for diving exhibitions, pool basketball, or just to cool off. The rest of us sat by the pool visiting and watching the young people at play. Fortunately it was dark by this time, because most of the guys had been golfing that day and had extremely unsightly golf tans.
KNOCK-OUT: Next, those crazy kids headed for the basketball court and played more knock-out games than I could count. There were about 30 people participating and so the competition was extremely tough. And I have no idea who won any of the games so if you are reading this to see your name in lights and get some glory, you will have to get used to disappointment.
FREEWHEELING, FREELOADING AND FOUR-WHEELING: A few guests enjoyed other activities throughout the evening. My husband and several others enjoyed four-wheeling over the grounds until they ran out of gas. When I slipped into the house for a few moments...okay yes, for another Connie’s Cookie...I noticed a couple of people had migrated into the air conditioned house and were watching a sporting event on television. Losers? Or were they just trying to avoid developing a heat rash? Who can say?
HIS AND HERS: Weddings can be such awkward affairs, can’t they? I mean, at times. Because you’re throwing two diverse families together and then sprinkling in his friends and her friends who don’t always know each other. The result is a random assortment of people who may not have much in common. For instance, for this wedding, we had a father of the bride who has a pool in his backyard, and we had a father of the groom who can’t swim. We had a mother of the bride who I suspect only bought one outfit for the wedding, and we had a mother of the groom who bought at least five. One honor attendant spent the last three years as a missionary in Africa, and the other honor attendant spent the last three years in high school. And finally, we had a flower girl who speaks softly and a ring bearer who carries a big stick. So you see, we definitely had our diversities.
ONE BIG HAPPY FAMILY: Which brings me to the real reason the evening was so beautiful, at least to me. It wasn’t the cookies or the sharing or the games. It was the fact that all these different people came together and by the end of the night, we were like one big, happy family. I wish we could have found time to sing "We’re all in this together" (from High School Musical) and perhaps choreograph a dance to go with it. But that wasn’t on the schedule for some reason.
So that’s it for Part 4. Stay tuned for Part 5 because we are heading into the actual Wedding Day! I know I’m excited.
I had a veal cutlet, carrot medallions, and fresh snow peas for lunch. Okay, no. I had tuna and wheat thins.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
WE INTERRUPT THIS WEDDING SERIES FOR AN IMPORTANT UPDATE
Do you need a breather? I know the wedding posts can be quite intense for some. So I thought today I would just stick with a family update.
Emily, aka Herr Dictator, has only 38 days left in her reign of terror. Okay, I’m exaggerating. But here’s the latest. Last Saturday, she and a friend decided to go garage-saling. Of course she spurns this activity when I suggest it...but that’s not my point. My point is Emily brought home some "treasures" to add to her stack of must-watch videos for the summer. And we all tried to act enthusiastic. She got Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat...and yes the music is awesome, but Donny Osmond really should have rethought that loin cloth bit. Disturbing.
Emily also brought home what she THOUGHT was the movie Honey I Shrunk the Kids. But when she removed the video from the case and placed it in the VCR, she began to dance around...yes, like Frosty. Because the people who sold it to her had mixed up their videos and cases...and it was none other than the SEQUEL to THE BUTTERCREAM GANG!! And the reason I use two exclamation points here is that just a week ago, after forcing us to watch the original movie, she told me about this sequel (information she gleaned from the internet) and said she wished she could see it sometime. So I ask you...WHAT ARE THE ODDS? I mean these are seriously obscure films people...even though one of my readers (Dixie!) actually watched them as a kid too. So Emily was ecstatic...no other word for it...and we then were forced to watch this sequel which...surprise, surprise...was not quite on a par with the original. And afterwards Emily says wistfully, "I hope we can find Honey I Shrunk the Kids for real next time." Or something to that effect. So the moral of this story is...be careful what you wish for...you might get it.
Rachel has started back seriously to dance class and is busy preparing for her role as Cinderella in the ballet by the same name. The most difficult part of this preparation appears to be finding a prince charming. I don’t know if I told you that she and her snow prince broke off their relationship several months ago due to irreconcilable differences. So he’s off the hook. She had another guy VOLUNTEER to learn the part...which was a bit worrisome...even more so when he asked Rachel if there was a kissing scene. But he’s sweet and so we’ll see about that one.
Meanwhile she had a major slip-up last night as my personal trainer. She came in from her speech class and handed me the biggest no-bake cookie you’ve ever seen. One of her classmates made them for a demonstration speech...and Rachel knows how much I adore them. So she only has herself to blame for any addition weight gain of mine.
David went to some football drill thing last night called "dip and slip." I asked him what that meant and he didn’t give me a straight answer. Could that be a sign that he’s on drugs? He brought home an invitation to the Quineanera and it said clearly "y sus appreciable familia" which I’m pretty sure means I’m invited too. Can someone confirm this? Mary?
David has also been the main instigator lately of us all playing Nertz every night. Emily is a hater on Nertz but she will even drag herself away from her movie-madness to play with us. Probably because David asks...and because she’s a victim of our "we will never pass this way again" mentality too.
As for Dave...dear sweet Dave...earlier this week, he woke me up frantically patting around on the sheets looking for his "other sock." He said, "I just had it!" Then he looks around on the floor and walks into the bathroom and searches there and then he comes back into the bedroom and...I’m not making this up...looks UNDER the fitted sheet on our bed for this sock. I said I didn’t think it would be there...but he was obviously determined to leave no stone unturned. Finally he gives up and gets another pair of socks out of the drawer. And that’s when he discovers his other sock is ON HIS OTHER FOOT.
I dreamed last night I was in a glass elevator 35 stories above the Pacific Ocean. This was a nice break from my usual dreams where I’m trimming my nails and/or doing laundry. So depressing to wake up and find those tasks still UNDONE.
I had more tuna and crackers for lunch. It's a rut, but a good one.
Emily, aka Herr Dictator, has only 38 days left in her reign of terror. Okay, I’m exaggerating. But here’s the latest. Last Saturday, she and a friend decided to go garage-saling. Of course she spurns this activity when I suggest it...but that’s not my point. My point is Emily brought home some "treasures" to add to her stack of must-watch videos for the summer. And we all tried to act enthusiastic. She got Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat...and yes the music is awesome, but Donny Osmond really should have rethought that loin cloth bit. Disturbing.
Emily also brought home what she THOUGHT was the movie Honey I Shrunk the Kids. But when she removed the video from the case and placed it in the VCR, she began to dance around...yes, like Frosty. Because the people who sold it to her had mixed up their videos and cases...and it was none other than the SEQUEL to THE BUTTERCREAM GANG!! And the reason I use two exclamation points here is that just a week ago, after forcing us to watch the original movie, she told me about this sequel (information she gleaned from the internet) and said she wished she could see it sometime. So I ask you...WHAT ARE THE ODDS? I mean these are seriously obscure films people...even though one of my readers (Dixie!) actually watched them as a kid too. So Emily was ecstatic...no other word for it...and we then were forced to watch this sequel which...surprise, surprise...was not quite on a par with the original. And afterwards Emily says wistfully, "I hope we can find Honey I Shrunk the Kids for real next time." Or something to that effect. So the moral of this story is...be careful what you wish for...you might get it.
Rachel has started back seriously to dance class and is busy preparing for her role as Cinderella in the ballet by the same name. The most difficult part of this preparation appears to be finding a prince charming. I don’t know if I told you that she and her snow prince broke off their relationship several months ago due to irreconcilable differences. So he’s off the hook. She had another guy VOLUNTEER to learn the part...which was a bit worrisome...even more so when he asked Rachel if there was a kissing scene. But he’s sweet and so we’ll see about that one.
Meanwhile she had a major slip-up last night as my personal trainer. She came in from her speech class and handed me the biggest no-bake cookie you’ve ever seen. One of her classmates made them for a demonstration speech...and Rachel knows how much I adore them. So she only has herself to blame for any addition weight gain of mine.
David went to some football drill thing last night called "dip and slip." I asked him what that meant and he didn’t give me a straight answer. Could that be a sign that he’s on drugs? He brought home an invitation to the Quineanera and it said clearly "y sus appreciable familia" which I’m pretty sure means I’m invited too. Can someone confirm this? Mary?
David has also been the main instigator lately of us all playing Nertz every night. Emily is a hater on Nertz but she will even drag herself away from her movie-madness to play with us. Probably because David asks...and because she’s a victim of our "we will never pass this way again" mentality too.
As for Dave...dear sweet Dave...earlier this week, he woke me up frantically patting around on the sheets looking for his "other sock." He said, "I just had it!" Then he looks around on the floor and walks into the bathroom and searches there and then he comes back into the bedroom and...I’m not making this up...looks UNDER the fitted sheet on our bed for this sock. I said I didn’t think it would be there...but he was obviously determined to leave no stone unturned. Finally he gives up and gets another pair of socks out of the drawer. And that’s when he discovers his other sock is ON HIS OTHER FOOT.
I dreamed last night I was in a glass elevator 35 stories above the Pacific Ocean. This was a nice break from my usual dreams where I’m trimming my nails and/or doing laundry. So depressing to wake up and find those tasks still UNDONE.
I had more tuna and crackers for lunch. It's a rut, but a good one.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 3 of probably 7
REHEARSAL DINNER - THE AFTERMATH
SHARING TIME: We moved right into sharing time (hereinafter "ST") immediately following dinner. I felt we should have waited at least 30 minutes...like you do before you swim...so that no one would get sick. Because to tell you the truth, this part of the wedding weekend can be quite brutal, turning many a happily oblivious person into an emotionally overwrought one. And who wants to do that on a full stomach? I know I don’t. But no one asked me.
THE LOVE FEST: So how do I describe this particular ST? Basically it was one sweet, sloppy mess. I definitely could have done without the reminder that Ben was ALWAYS respectful and loving towards my mother...the only grandchild of his age group to merit that praise. But other than that cruel remark, the rest of the sharing was bearable. Many sharers made us laugh and only a few made us cry. All were eloquent and mercifully brief. And only a couple were delusional. That list would include Courtney’s dad who couldn’t find anything bad to say about Ben. He’s obviously never ridden in a 15-passenger van with him for 20 hours straight. But maybe it’s good for the in-laws to wear those rose-colored glasses...and choose to look past minor flaws.
SENTIMENTALLY-CHALLENGED: And a final note on STs in general. First of all, do we have to call it SHARE time? Mr. Rogers would like it...and my mother would. But I would prefer something less blatantly schmaltzy. Like "chatter-fest" or "shmooze-time". I never knew we called it anything until this particular wedding...and then the word "share" just made me nervous. Which leads me to my next final note on STs which is that I hope no one is offended when I don’t say my piece on these occasions. I always think I will, but at the last minute I chicken out. It’s not that I don’t have sickeningly sweet things to add...but I am not emotionally stable at this point in my life. I recently got teary-eyed when I got a new mouse at work...so can you imagine the drama that would ensue if I had to get up and talk about my Ben? I mean years ago, I took pictures and videos of him and sent them to some studio to see if they’d cast him in their Dennis the Menace movie...so obviously I’m a doting aunt. But I just can’t "share" right now.
My incisive (intelligently analytical and concise) narrative on THE GAMES will have to wait for Part IV. If they end up making a movie of my blog, there’s a good chance my seventh wedding post will have to be shot in two parts.
I had my old standby for lunch today...tuna and wheat thins. Still delicious after all these weeks.
SHARING TIME: We moved right into sharing time (hereinafter "ST") immediately following dinner. I felt we should have waited at least 30 minutes...like you do before you swim...so that no one would get sick. Because to tell you the truth, this part of the wedding weekend can be quite brutal, turning many a happily oblivious person into an emotionally overwrought one. And who wants to do that on a full stomach? I know I don’t. But no one asked me.
THE LOVE FEST: So how do I describe this particular ST? Basically it was one sweet, sloppy mess. I definitely could have done without the reminder that Ben was ALWAYS respectful and loving towards my mother...the only grandchild of his age group to merit that praise. But other than that cruel remark, the rest of the sharing was bearable. Many sharers made us laugh and only a few made us cry. All were eloquent and mercifully brief. And only a couple were delusional. That list would include Courtney’s dad who couldn’t find anything bad to say about Ben. He’s obviously never ridden in a 15-passenger van with him for 20 hours straight. But maybe it’s good for the in-laws to wear those rose-colored glasses...and choose to look past minor flaws.
SENTIMENTALLY-CHALLENGED: And a final note on STs in general. First of all, do we have to call it SHARE time? Mr. Rogers would like it...and my mother would. But I would prefer something less blatantly schmaltzy. Like "chatter-fest" or "shmooze-time". I never knew we called it anything until this particular wedding...and then the word "share" just made me nervous. Which leads me to my next final note on STs which is that I hope no one is offended when I don’t say my piece on these occasions. I always think I will, but at the last minute I chicken out. It’s not that I don’t have sickeningly sweet things to add...but I am not emotionally stable at this point in my life. I recently got teary-eyed when I got a new mouse at work...so can you imagine the drama that would ensue if I had to get up and talk about my Ben? I mean years ago, I took pictures and videos of him and sent them to some studio to see if they’d cast him in their Dennis the Menace movie...so obviously I’m a doting aunt. But I just can’t "share" right now.
My incisive (intelligently analytical and concise) narrative on THE GAMES will have to wait for Part IV. If they end up making a movie of my blog, there’s a good chance my seventh wedding post will have to be shot in two parts.
I had my old standby for lunch today...tuna and wheat thins. Still delicious after all these weeks.
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