THE PROCESSION BEGINS
WE HAVE LIFT-OFF: Have you ever watched one of those NASA rocket launches on TV? You know, where the preliminary stuff seems interminable, and you wonder if they’ll EVER get to the countdown, but you sit through it just to finally see that glorious launch and hear them say "we have lift-off"? Well I feel like it’s been a similar journey throughout this wedding series, but now I’m happy to report that we’re through with the preliminaries ...and moving on to the glorious main event! And I’m also happy to report that the wedding was NOT scuttled...like some launches are. And I would like to take this time to thank you for your patience and perseverance...and for not waiting in hopes that an abridged version of this wedding series would be released.
MEET THE PARENTS: So first off, and as usual, came the seating of the grandparents and parents. I think Courtney’s brother Grant escorted his mom down the aisle and of course Ben escorted his parents. Then there had to be so much hugging before everyone either sat down or took their places. And it wouldn’t have been so bad but I think that’s when they were playing that Matthew West song When I Say I Do. You can listen to this beautiful song on YouTube, and picture those proud parents and grandparents coming down the aisle looking oh so happy, but maybe a bit reflective too. But this might make you cry. So if you would rather not cry, you can just make up a tune and sing the song yourself (lyrics below) and chances are this will NOT make you cry. Unless of course, you have a decent voice AND know the song...and in that case you might make yourself cry. But that won’t be my fault (Luke).
WHEN I SAY I DO
There must be a God, I believe it’s true
cause I can see his love when I look at you.
And he must have a plan
for this crazy life
cause he brought you here
and placed you by my side.
CHORUS:
Cause I have never been so sure of anything before
Like I am in this moment here with you.
Now for better or for worse
are so much more than only words.
And I pray everyday will be the proof
that I mean what I say when I say I do,
yeah I mean what I say when I say I do.
You see these hands you hold will always hold you up
When the strength you have just ain’t strong enough.
And what tomorrow brings only time will tell
But I will stand by you in sickness and in health.
CHORUS
BRIDGE:
Take my hand and take this ring
and know that I will always love you through anything
As the years march on
like a beating heart
I will live these words
‘til death do us part.
CHORUS
PRETTY MAIDS ALL IN A ROW: Next came the bridesmaids and groomsmen down the aisle...two by two. And I wish I had some drama to relate here but everyone looked good and seemed happy and no one tripped so I’ve got nothing.
THE LITTLE ONES: Then came Nora in a sweet little lavender dress with white trim and Bennett in a purple striped button-down shirt and his Converse tennis shoes. They held hands and Bennett was clearly leading Nora along, but he had his free hand over his face at all times...so of course we couldn’t see him. Clearly the most comical moment of the procession...and one of the sweetest.
And here comes the bride will have to wait until next time...because I have to go home and greet David who just got home from camp. Well, really, I’m not going to greet him so much as lecture him because he went straight to a friend’s house and hung out for awhile before we made him come home. Poor guy.
And I had a turkey sandwich and chips for lunch.
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Thursday, July 22, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 7 of who knows how many?
THE CEREMONY - Well...almost.
THE COOL-DOWN: The guest reception table was ably manned by a small army of the groom’s cousins. Emily and Abbie greeted the guests, asked everyone to sign the picture frame, and handed out the programs...which were cleverly printed on fans with sweet lavender bows tied to the handles. Meanwhile, next to the guest table were two good-sized buckets of ice filled with bottled water which David and David Paul toweled dry and handed to the arriving guests. This was the first time I’d been to a wedding where I was offered cooling agents before I sat down...but it made me feel like a pampered guest at an exclusive resort...so I liked it.
THE WARM-UP: So the story, as I understand it, goes something like this. A few months before the wedding, Ben and Courtney have no music planned for the event. But then this guy named Trevor moves into the house where Ben lives...and lo and behold, he’s a pretty decent guitarist. So naturally Ben and Courtney say...hey would you play some songs to warm up the crowd before our wedding...and he says yes. Then at some point they remember that Rachel can play violin...so they ask if she’ll do Canon in D with this guy for the procession. And she says yes...and so they think they’ve got everything covered. But then at some point (perhaps the night of the wedding), it becomes clear to at least one person that an additional singer might come in handy...for harmonizing of course...and fortunately one of the groomsmen was able to step up to the plate. And that’s how the wedding music came to be, folks.
THE VOCAL STYLINGS OF TREVOR AND COLE: So while we were busy trying to stay cool, the musicians were told to WARM UP that crowd. And that’s what they did. They sang and played a selection of those breezy, crazy-in-love songs...perfect for any warm summer evening but especially this one...with love in the air. Of course, it doesn’t pay to analyze the words of those songs too much. I find myself wondering what kind of guy would "sit and stare" while some girl "thoughtfully thumbs through her hair." And what kind of girl would fall for a guy who "sits there slack-jawed with nothing to say". But when Stephen Speaks sings those words...or even two random guys like Trevor and Cole...somehow we don’t see it as two young lovers who act like idiots. We just believe in the sappy, happy ending. Or the sappy, happy beginning...in this case...
Oops. My time's up and once again, I have to quit just when things are beginning to get interesting. I bet I could write soap operas...if I had a mind to. But I better get this wedding series finished first.
I have so much on the family to tell you too, that I’m worried that I’ll never catch up. But I will persevere. I had this chicken and broccoli croissant thing for lunch, which I had to heat up in a little cardboard pocket in the microwave. And it wasn’t the worst thing I’ve ever tasted. I also had some fruit cup. But to make up for that lunch, I had some green beans FROM OUR GARDEN for dinner, with a turkey sandwich, and both were...delectable.
THE COOL-DOWN: The guest reception table was ably manned by a small army of the groom’s cousins. Emily and Abbie greeted the guests, asked everyone to sign the picture frame, and handed out the programs...which were cleverly printed on fans with sweet lavender bows tied to the handles. Meanwhile, next to the guest table were two good-sized buckets of ice filled with bottled water which David and David Paul toweled dry and handed to the arriving guests. This was the first time I’d been to a wedding where I was offered cooling agents before I sat down...but it made me feel like a pampered guest at an exclusive resort...so I liked it.
THE WARM-UP: So the story, as I understand it, goes something like this. A few months before the wedding, Ben and Courtney have no music planned for the event. But then this guy named Trevor moves into the house where Ben lives...and lo and behold, he’s a pretty decent guitarist. So naturally Ben and Courtney say...hey would you play some songs to warm up the crowd before our wedding...and he says yes. Then at some point they remember that Rachel can play violin...so they ask if she’ll do Canon in D with this guy for the procession. And she says yes...and so they think they’ve got everything covered. But then at some point (perhaps the night of the wedding), it becomes clear to at least one person that an additional singer might come in handy...for harmonizing of course...and fortunately one of the groomsmen was able to step up to the plate. And that’s how the wedding music came to be, folks.
THE VOCAL STYLINGS OF TREVOR AND COLE: So while we were busy trying to stay cool, the musicians were told to WARM UP that crowd. And that’s what they did. They sang and played a selection of those breezy, crazy-in-love songs...perfect for any warm summer evening but especially this one...with love in the air. Of course, it doesn’t pay to analyze the words of those songs too much. I find myself wondering what kind of guy would "sit and stare" while some girl "thoughtfully thumbs through her hair." And what kind of girl would fall for a guy who "sits there slack-jawed with nothing to say". But when Stephen Speaks sings those words...or even two random guys like Trevor and Cole...somehow we don’t see it as two young lovers who act like idiots. We just believe in the sappy, happy ending. Or the sappy, happy beginning...in this case...
Oops. My time's up and once again, I have to quit just when things are beginning to get interesting. I bet I could write soap operas...if I had a mind to. But I better get this wedding series finished first.
I have so much on the family to tell you too, that I’m worried that I’ll never catch up. But I will persevere. I had this chicken and broccoli croissant thing for lunch, which I had to heat up in a little cardboard pocket in the microwave. And it wasn’t the worst thing I’ve ever tasted. I also had some fruit cup. But to make up for that lunch, I had some green beans FROM OUR GARDEN for dinner, with a turkey sandwich, and both were...delectable.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 6 of who knows how many?
MORE PRELUDE STUFF
APOLOGY ACCEPTED: We were asked to be out at Courtney’s house by 6 p.m. for pictures. Since the ceremony wasn’t until 7:30, there was some concern that even if we arrived looking fresh and crisp for the pictures, we’d be looking more like so much wilted spinach by actual ceremony time. Because let’s be honest, the great outdoors in Oklahoma is a virtual sauna in June. And I don’t blame Courtney for planning an outdoor wedding then. I blame Ben...because he’s in his crazy-mixed-up-medical-school-days, and thought he’d enjoy his honeymoon more if he didn’t have to spend most of it studying for his boards. He did apologize, and profusely. And naturally we forgave him, and tried to keep our grumbling to a minimum.
DESERT ISLANDS: And at least for me, this "wedding in a sauna" thing turned out to be a good thing. Not only because it allowed me to sweat out all my impurities, but also because it was one of those great EQUALIZER things. Of course the bride and a few others managed to look fresh throughout the night, but the rest of us drooped TOGETHER and bonded...just like fellow survivors of a shipwreck. And here of course I’m thinking of Gilligan’s Island where Kansas farm girl Maryann was able to mingle easily with Hollywood starlet Ginger because they were stranded on a desert island together. In much the same way, I was able to mingle quite easily with those much classier than me because the heat brought them down to my level of grooming. Not that I’m comparing this wedding to a shipwreck...because other than the heat, and maybe one guest who reminded me of the Professor, there really weren’t any other similarities.
THE SET-UP: So you know how when you order fajitas, the waiter first brings you that lovely set-up? A plate full of guacamole and pico de gallo and other goodies? Someone in my family once started eating those accompaniments like it was a salad before his meal...I think it was Zach...and we found that amusing. But the point is that a good set-up always sets a festive mood and prepares you for the sizzling stuff to come. And that’s how it was with the set-up for the wedding. The gates by the road festooned with purple wreaths, the musicians tuning up their instruments, the wedding party bedecked in lavenders and purples all milling about the place. All of this and more provided a festive atmosphere...preparing us for the sizzling wedding ceremony to come. Pun intended, by the way...
And I’m so sorry. I don’t mean to leave you with a cliffhanger...but I have to cut this one short. My family calls and I must answer. For lunch today, I had a special treat. I was in Wichita for a doctor’s appointment (which I will tell you about later, you lucky dogs you) and met my sister Susan at Five Guys and a Burger...or is it just Five Guys Burgers?...something like that anyway. And we had burgers and fries...and they were great...but the company was the BEST.
APOLOGY ACCEPTED: We were asked to be out at Courtney’s house by 6 p.m. for pictures. Since the ceremony wasn’t until 7:30, there was some concern that even if we arrived looking fresh and crisp for the pictures, we’d be looking more like so much wilted spinach by actual ceremony time. Because let’s be honest, the great outdoors in Oklahoma is a virtual sauna in June. And I don’t blame Courtney for planning an outdoor wedding then. I blame Ben...because he’s in his crazy-mixed-up-medical-school-days, and thought he’d enjoy his honeymoon more if he didn’t have to spend most of it studying for his boards. He did apologize, and profusely. And naturally we forgave him, and tried to keep our grumbling to a minimum.
DESERT ISLANDS: And at least for me, this "wedding in a sauna" thing turned out to be a good thing. Not only because it allowed me to sweat out all my impurities, but also because it was one of those great EQUALIZER things. Of course the bride and a few others managed to look fresh throughout the night, but the rest of us drooped TOGETHER and bonded...just like fellow survivors of a shipwreck. And here of course I’m thinking of Gilligan’s Island where Kansas farm girl Maryann was able to mingle easily with Hollywood starlet Ginger because they were stranded on a desert island together. In much the same way, I was able to mingle quite easily with those much classier than me because the heat brought them down to my level of grooming. Not that I’m comparing this wedding to a shipwreck...because other than the heat, and maybe one guest who reminded me of the Professor, there really weren’t any other similarities.
THE SET-UP: So you know how when you order fajitas, the waiter first brings you that lovely set-up? A plate full of guacamole and pico de gallo and other goodies? Someone in my family once started eating those accompaniments like it was a salad before his meal...I think it was Zach...and we found that amusing. But the point is that a good set-up always sets a festive mood and prepares you for the sizzling stuff to come. And that’s how it was with the set-up for the wedding. The gates by the road festooned with purple wreaths, the musicians tuning up their instruments, the wedding party bedecked in lavenders and purples all milling about the place. All of this and more provided a festive atmosphere...preparing us for the sizzling wedding ceremony to come. Pun intended, by the way...
And I’m so sorry. I don’t mean to leave you with a cliffhanger...but I have to cut this one short. My family calls and I must answer. For lunch today, I had a special treat. I was in Wichita for a doctor’s appointment (which I will tell you about later, you lucky dogs you) and met my sister Susan at Five Guys and a Burger...or is it just Five Guys Burgers?...something like that anyway. And we had burgers and fries...and they were great...but the company was the BEST.
Saturday, July 17, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 5 of at least 7
PRELUDE TO A WEDDING
MATCHING TANK TOPS: I would welcome a guest blogger to jump in here with all the intimate details of Saturday morning at the bride’s house and/or at the groomsmen’s golf outing. My first sighting of the wedding party was early afternoon at the church building where Courtney’s family attends. Everyone had gathered there for lunch, but the bride and bridesmaids were also planning to get ready for the wedding in the spacious comfort of the church’s "living room". I was pleased to see that the bridesmaids were wearing matching tank tops because then I could stop wondering who was in the wedding and who was just a random cousin or whatnot. It’s important to know these things so while you’re trying to make small-talk you don’t say to a girl...oh, what did the bridesmaids do last night?...and have them give you a sad look and reply...I wouldn’t know. Because that’s embarrassing.
THE FAIRY GODMOTHER: So the already pretty girls spent the next few hours transforming themselves and each other into knock-out bridesmaids...worthy of deflecting all those evil spirits which people used to think attended weddings to prey on brides. As usual, the wedding party beauty salon was presided over by my nephew Zach’s wife, Haley. Not only is she a professional but she’s basically our family’s own personal fairy godmother. Because with the right product and hair appliance, she can turn any old ash-covered girl into a beautiful Cinderella. So, she comes to these events armed with an impressive array of that product and those hair appliances, and she calmly curls and/or straightens and sprays as many of the bridesmaids as she has time for, but her piece de resistance is always, of course, the BRIDE. Haley's energies and abilities always amaze me, but she obviously can’t get to everyone. So some less fortunate bridesmaids have to be content with the ministrations of fellow bridesmaids. But even for them, Haley always has time for consultations...and is constantly recommending this or that product or this or that tweak. So that in the end, everyone walks out of the room looking...and there's no other word for it...FABULOUS.
PROPORTIONAL HAIRSTYLING: Well...except for me. Obviously, as the aunt of the groom, I wasn’t high on the priority list for beautifying this time. But my niece Katy was wielding a straightener and agreed to "straighten" me. And bless her heart, she worked with relish and considerable skill, and it was all very relaxing. But after she was done, everyone who looked at me either giggled and/or grimaced. And I knew why. See I have this puffy, sort of roundish face. In fact, some years ago shortly after learning the word "porcine", I would ofttimes find that word coming to mind when looking in a mirror. No, don’t feel sorry for me...because I think pigs are kind of cute...in a piggy sort of way. Look at Wilbur on Charlotte’s Web...who couldn’t love a face like that? But my point it that people with puffy round faces should NEVER adopt a flattened hairstyle. Not only does it give you that drowned rat look, but it accentuates your big face and actually makes you look bigger. For the same reason, big women like me know NEVER to carry a small purse. We need BIG purses to go with our bodies. So in the same way, I need a bigger hairstyle. But I do love Katy for trying. She’s precious and nearly perfect in every way.
I’m on my way to the Quinceanera so I have to stop here. In Part 6, we will move into the evening hours and probably even get to the ceremony. Hope springs eternal, doesn’t it?
I had a bowl of leftover fried rice for lunch today. Rachel...in a fit of domesticity...whipped it up last night for our supper. And it was seriously some of the best fried rice I’ve ever tasted, even left over. I asked her how she made it so good and she said she’s just cool like that. So maybe she’s not ready for her own cooking show.
MATCHING TANK TOPS: I would welcome a guest blogger to jump in here with all the intimate details of Saturday morning at the bride’s house and/or at the groomsmen’s golf outing. My first sighting of the wedding party was early afternoon at the church building where Courtney’s family attends. Everyone had gathered there for lunch, but the bride and bridesmaids were also planning to get ready for the wedding in the spacious comfort of the church’s "living room". I was pleased to see that the bridesmaids were wearing matching tank tops because then I could stop wondering who was in the wedding and who was just a random cousin or whatnot. It’s important to know these things so while you’re trying to make small-talk you don’t say to a girl...oh, what did the bridesmaids do last night?...and have them give you a sad look and reply...I wouldn’t know. Because that’s embarrassing.
THE FAIRY GODMOTHER: So the already pretty girls spent the next few hours transforming themselves and each other into knock-out bridesmaids...worthy of deflecting all those evil spirits which people used to think attended weddings to prey on brides. As usual, the wedding party beauty salon was presided over by my nephew Zach’s wife, Haley. Not only is she a professional but she’s basically our family’s own personal fairy godmother. Because with the right product and hair appliance, she can turn any old ash-covered girl into a beautiful Cinderella. So, she comes to these events armed with an impressive array of that product and those hair appliances, and she calmly curls and/or straightens and sprays as many of the bridesmaids as she has time for, but her piece de resistance is always, of course, the BRIDE. Haley's energies and abilities always amaze me, but she obviously can’t get to everyone. So some less fortunate bridesmaids have to be content with the ministrations of fellow bridesmaids. But even for them, Haley always has time for consultations...and is constantly recommending this or that product or this or that tweak. So that in the end, everyone walks out of the room looking...and there's no other word for it...FABULOUS.
PROPORTIONAL HAIRSTYLING: Well...except for me. Obviously, as the aunt of the groom, I wasn’t high on the priority list for beautifying this time. But my niece Katy was wielding a straightener and agreed to "straighten" me. And bless her heart, she worked with relish and considerable skill, and it was all very relaxing. But after she was done, everyone who looked at me either giggled and/or grimaced. And I knew why. See I have this puffy, sort of roundish face. In fact, some years ago shortly after learning the word "porcine", I would ofttimes find that word coming to mind when looking in a mirror. No, don’t feel sorry for me...because I think pigs are kind of cute...in a piggy sort of way. Look at Wilbur on Charlotte’s Web...who couldn’t love a face like that? But my point it that people with puffy round faces should NEVER adopt a flattened hairstyle. Not only does it give you that drowned rat look, but it accentuates your big face and actually makes you look bigger. For the same reason, big women like me know NEVER to carry a small purse. We need BIG purses to go with our bodies. So in the same way, I need a bigger hairstyle. But I do love Katy for trying. She’s precious and nearly perfect in every way.
I’m on my way to the Quinceanera so I have to stop here. In Part 6, we will move into the evening hours and probably even get to the ceremony. Hope springs eternal, doesn’t it?
I had a bowl of leftover fried rice for lunch today. Rachel...in a fit of domesticity...whipped it up last night for our supper. And it was seriously some of the best fried rice I’ve ever tasted, even left over. I asked her how she made it so good and she said she’s just cool like that. So maybe she’s not ready for her own cooking show.
Friday, July 16, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 4 of at least 7
REHEARSAL DINNER - THE AFTERMATH (Part 2)
CORRECTIONS: Before I proceed, I need to make two corrections to my earlier wedding posts. One is that there were nine bridesmaids and nine groomsmen (including the honor attendants) and not eight as previously stated. Again, that’s NINE, and I figured this out on my own. One of my daughters pointed out my other error and not sweetly, I might add. She said it was the BROTHER of the bride who was delusional by saying he couldn’t find anything wrong with Ben. I apologize for any inconvenience caused by these errors.
EVEN LUKE HAD OPTIONS: So after sharing time, we were offered many activity options. Courtney’s dad and/or brother had mowed a pasture and marked the lines for a softball game so most folks headed over there first. I was busy catching up with my long lost aunts and uncles so I didn’t play and thus have no gory details for you. I did hear that they chose up sides the old-fashioned way and I really wish I’d been there to spare anyone else the shame of being picked last. Because that honor always goes to me during any family ball game. And I actually don’t mind because then there are no expectations of me...and so I can quit anytime I feel like it, which is usually after running just once to first base. I also take a lawn chair with me anytime our team takes the field...no sense in wasting my energy pretending I’m ready to catch a fly ball when I’m not. I think these habits of mine somehow disguise my natural athleticism, and thus hurt my chances of getting picked any sooner than last.
EVERYBODY IN THE POOL: Fortunately the pool in Courtney’s backyard was much larger than the motels. Because at some point after the softball game all the people who were young enough not to scare anyone in their swimsuits made their way into the pool for diving exhibitions, pool basketball, or just to cool off. The rest of us sat by the pool visiting and watching the young people at play. Fortunately it was dark by this time, because most of the guys had been golfing that day and had extremely unsightly golf tans.
KNOCK-OUT: Next, those crazy kids headed for the basketball court and played more knock-out games than I could count. There were about 30 people participating and so the competition was extremely tough. And I have no idea who won any of the games so if you are reading this to see your name in lights and get some glory, you will have to get used to disappointment.
FREEWHEELING, FREELOADING AND FOUR-WHEELING: A few guests enjoyed other activities throughout the evening. My husband and several others enjoyed four-wheeling over the grounds until they ran out of gas. When I slipped into the house for a few moments...okay yes, for another Connie’s Cookie...I noticed a couple of people had migrated into the air conditioned house and were watching a sporting event on television. Losers? Or were they just trying to avoid developing a heat rash? Who can say?
HIS AND HERS: Weddings can be such awkward affairs, can’t they? I mean, at times. Because you’re throwing two diverse families together and then sprinkling in his friends and her friends who don’t always know each other. The result is a random assortment of people who may not have much in common. For instance, for this wedding, we had a father of the bride who has a pool in his backyard, and we had a father of the groom who can’t swim. We had a mother of the bride who I suspect only bought one outfit for the wedding, and we had a mother of the groom who bought at least five. One honor attendant spent the last three years as a missionary in Africa, and the other honor attendant spent the last three years in high school. And finally, we had a flower girl who speaks softly and a ring bearer who carries a big stick. So you see, we definitely had our diversities.
ONE BIG HAPPY FAMILY: Which brings me to the real reason the evening was so beautiful, at least to me. It wasn’t the cookies or the sharing or the games. It was the fact that all these different people came together and by the end of the night, we were like one big, happy family. I wish we could have found time to sing "We’re all in this together" (from High School Musical) and perhaps choreograph a dance to go with it. But that wasn’t on the schedule for some reason.
So that’s it for Part 4. Stay tuned for Part 5 because we are heading into the actual Wedding Day! I know I’m excited.
I had a veal cutlet, carrot medallions, and fresh snow peas for lunch. Okay, no. I had tuna and wheat thins.
CORRECTIONS: Before I proceed, I need to make two corrections to my earlier wedding posts. One is that there were nine bridesmaids and nine groomsmen (including the honor attendants) and not eight as previously stated. Again, that’s NINE, and I figured this out on my own. One of my daughters pointed out my other error and not sweetly, I might add. She said it was the BROTHER of the bride who was delusional by saying he couldn’t find anything wrong with Ben. I apologize for any inconvenience caused by these errors.
EVEN LUKE HAD OPTIONS: So after sharing time, we were offered many activity options. Courtney’s dad and/or brother had mowed a pasture and marked the lines for a softball game so most folks headed over there first. I was busy catching up with my long lost aunts and uncles so I didn’t play and thus have no gory details for you. I did hear that they chose up sides the old-fashioned way and I really wish I’d been there to spare anyone else the shame of being picked last. Because that honor always goes to me during any family ball game. And I actually don’t mind because then there are no expectations of me...and so I can quit anytime I feel like it, which is usually after running just once to first base. I also take a lawn chair with me anytime our team takes the field...no sense in wasting my energy pretending I’m ready to catch a fly ball when I’m not. I think these habits of mine somehow disguise my natural athleticism, and thus hurt my chances of getting picked any sooner than last.
EVERYBODY IN THE POOL: Fortunately the pool in Courtney’s backyard was much larger than the motels. Because at some point after the softball game all the people who were young enough not to scare anyone in their swimsuits made their way into the pool for diving exhibitions, pool basketball, or just to cool off. The rest of us sat by the pool visiting and watching the young people at play. Fortunately it was dark by this time, because most of the guys had been golfing that day and had extremely unsightly golf tans.
KNOCK-OUT: Next, those crazy kids headed for the basketball court and played more knock-out games than I could count. There were about 30 people participating and so the competition was extremely tough. And I have no idea who won any of the games so if you are reading this to see your name in lights and get some glory, you will have to get used to disappointment.
FREEWHEELING, FREELOADING AND FOUR-WHEELING: A few guests enjoyed other activities throughout the evening. My husband and several others enjoyed four-wheeling over the grounds until they ran out of gas. When I slipped into the house for a few moments...okay yes, for another Connie’s Cookie...I noticed a couple of people had migrated into the air conditioned house and were watching a sporting event on television. Losers? Or were they just trying to avoid developing a heat rash? Who can say?
HIS AND HERS: Weddings can be such awkward affairs, can’t they? I mean, at times. Because you’re throwing two diverse families together and then sprinkling in his friends and her friends who don’t always know each other. The result is a random assortment of people who may not have much in common. For instance, for this wedding, we had a father of the bride who has a pool in his backyard, and we had a father of the groom who can’t swim. We had a mother of the bride who I suspect only bought one outfit for the wedding, and we had a mother of the groom who bought at least five. One honor attendant spent the last three years as a missionary in Africa, and the other honor attendant spent the last three years in high school. And finally, we had a flower girl who speaks softly and a ring bearer who carries a big stick. So you see, we definitely had our diversities.
ONE BIG HAPPY FAMILY: Which brings me to the real reason the evening was so beautiful, at least to me. It wasn’t the cookies or the sharing or the games. It was the fact that all these different people came together and by the end of the night, we were like one big, happy family. I wish we could have found time to sing "We’re all in this together" (from High School Musical) and perhaps choreograph a dance to go with it. But that wasn’t on the schedule for some reason.
So that’s it for Part 4. Stay tuned for Part 5 because we are heading into the actual Wedding Day! I know I’m excited.
I had a veal cutlet, carrot medallions, and fresh snow peas for lunch. Okay, no. I had tuna and wheat thins.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
WE INTERRUPT THIS WEDDING SERIES FOR AN IMPORTANT UPDATE
Do you need a breather? I know the wedding posts can be quite intense for some. So I thought today I would just stick with a family update.
Emily, aka Herr Dictator, has only 38 days left in her reign of terror. Okay, I’m exaggerating. But here’s the latest. Last Saturday, she and a friend decided to go garage-saling. Of course she spurns this activity when I suggest it...but that’s not my point. My point is Emily brought home some "treasures" to add to her stack of must-watch videos for the summer. And we all tried to act enthusiastic. She got Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat...and yes the music is awesome, but Donny Osmond really should have rethought that loin cloth bit. Disturbing.
Emily also brought home what she THOUGHT was the movie Honey I Shrunk the Kids. But when she removed the video from the case and placed it in the VCR, she began to dance around...yes, like Frosty. Because the people who sold it to her had mixed up their videos and cases...and it was none other than the SEQUEL to THE BUTTERCREAM GANG!! And the reason I use two exclamation points here is that just a week ago, after forcing us to watch the original movie, she told me about this sequel (information she gleaned from the internet) and said she wished she could see it sometime. So I ask you...WHAT ARE THE ODDS? I mean these are seriously obscure films people...even though one of my readers (Dixie!) actually watched them as a kid too. So Emily was ecstatic...no other word for it...and we then were forced to watch this sequel which...surprise, surprise...was not quite on a par with the original. And afterwards Emily says wistfully, "I hope we can find Honey I Shrunk the Kids for real next time." Or something to that effect. So the moral of this story is...be careful what you wish for...you might get it.
Rachel has started back seriously to dance class and is busy preparing for her role as Cinderella in the ballet by the same name. The most difficult part of this preparation appears to be finding a prince charming. I don’t know if I told you that she and her snow prince broke off their relationship several months ago due to irreconcilable differences. So he’s off the hook. She had another guy VOLUNTEER to learn the part...which was a bit worrisome...even more so when he asked Rachel if there was a kissing scene. But he’s sweet and so we’ll see about that one.
Meanwhile she had a major slip-up last night as my personal trainer. She came in from her speech class and handed me the biggest no-bake cookie you’ve ever seen. One of her classmates made them for a demonstration speech...and Rachel knows how much I adore them. So she only has herself to blame for any addition weight gain of mine.
David went to some football drill thing last night called "dip and slip." I asked him what that meant and he didn’t give me a straight answer. Could that be a sign that he’s on drugs? He brought home an invitation to the Quineanera and it said clearly "y sus appreciable familia" which I’m pretty sure means I’m invited too. Can someone confirm this? Mary?
David has also been the main instigator lately of us all playing Nertz every night. Emily is a hater on Nertz but she will even drag herself away from her movie-madness to play with us. Probably because David asks...and because she’s a victim of our "we will never pass this way again" mentality too.
As for Dave...dear sweet Dave...earlier this week, he woke me up frantically patting around on the sheets looking for his "other sock." He said, "I just had it!" Then he looks around on the floor and walks into the bathroom and searches there and then he comes back into the bedroom and...I’m not making this up...looks UNDER the fitted sheet on our bed for this sock. I said I didn’t think it would be there...but he was obviously determined to leave no stone unturned. Finally he gives up and gets another pair of socks out of the drawer. And that’s when he discovers his other sock is ON HIS OTHER FOOT.
I dreamed last night I was in a glass elevator 35 stories above the Pacific Ocean. This was a nice break from my usual dreams where I’m trimming my nails and/or doing laundry. So depressing to wake up and find those tasks still UNDONE.
I had more tuna and crackers for lunch. It's a rut, but a good one.
Emily, aka Herr Dictator, has only 38 days left in her reign of terror. Okay, I’m exaggerating. But here’s the latest. Last Saturday, she and a friend decided to go garage-saling. Of course she spurns this activity when I suggest it...but that’s not my point. My point is Emily brought home some "treasures" to add to her stack of must-watch videos for the summer. And we all tried to act enthusiastic. She got Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat...and yes the music is awesome, but Donny Osmond really should have rethought that loin cloth bit. Disturbing.
Emily also brought home what she THOUGHT was the movie Honey I Shrunk the Kids. But when she removed the video from the case and placed it in the VCR, she began to dance around...yes, like Frosty. Because the people who sold it to her had mixed up their videos and cases...and it was none other than the SEQUEL to THE BUTTERCREAM GANG!! And the reason I use two exclamation points here is that just a week ago, after forcing us to watch the original movie, she told me about this sequel (information she gleaned from the internet) and said she wished she could see it sometime. So I ask you...WHAT ARE THE ODDS? I mean these are seriously obscure films people...even though one of my readers (Dixie!) actually watched them as a kid too. So Emily was ecstatic...no other word for it...and we then were forced to watch this sequel which...surprise, surprise...was not quite on a par with the original. And afterwards Emily says wistfully, "I hope we can find Honey I Shrunk the Kids for real next time." Or something to that effect. So the moral of this story is...be careful what you wish for...you might get it.
Rachel has started back seriously to dance class and is busy preparing for her role as Cinderella in the ballet by the same name. The most difficult part of this preparation appears to be finding a prince charming. I don’t know if I told you that she and her snow prince broke off their relationship several months ago due to irreconcilable differences. So he’s off the hook. She had another guy VOLUNTEER to learn the part...which was a bit worrisome...even more so when he asked Rachel if there was a kissing scene. But he’s sweet and so we’ll see about that one.
Meanwhile she had a major slip-up last night as my personal trainer. She came in from her speech class and handed me the biggest no-bake cookie you’ve ever seen. One of her classmates made them for a demonstration speech...and Rachel knows how much I adore them. So she only has herself to blame for any addition weight gain of mine.
David went to some football drill thing last night called "dip and slip." I asked him what that meant and he didn’t give me a straight answer. Could that be a sign that he’s on drugs? He brought home an invitation to the Quineanera and it said clearly "y sus appreciable familia" which I’m pretty sure means I’m invited too. Can someone confirm this? Mary?
David has also been the main instigator lately of us all playing Nertz every night. Emily is a hater on Nertz but she will even drag herself away from her movie-madness to play with us. Probably because David asks...and because she’s a victim of our "we will never pass this way again" mentality too.
As for Dave...dear sweet Dave...earlier this week, he woke me up frantically patting around on the sheets looking for his "other sock." He said, "I just had it!" Then he looks around on the floor and walks into the bathroom and searches there and then he comes back into the bedroom and...I’m not making this up...looks UNDER the fitted sheet on our bed for this sock. I said I didn’t think it would be there...but he was obviously determined to leave no stone unturned. Finally he gives up and gets another pair of socks out of the drawer. And that’s when he discovers his other sock is ON HIS OTHER FOOT.
I dreamed last night I was in a glass elevator 35 stories above the Pacific Ocean. This was a nice break from my usual dreams where I’m trimming my nails and/or doing laundry. So depressing to wake up and find those tasks still UNDONE.
I had more tuna and crackers for lunch. It's a rut, but a good one.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 3 of probably 7
REHEARSAL DINNER - THE AFTERMATH
SHARING TIME: We moved right into sharing time (hereinafter "ST") immediately following dinner. I felt we should have waited at least 30 minutes...like you do before you swim...so that no one would get sick. Because to tell you the truth, this part of the wedding weekend can be quite brutal, turning many a happily oblivious person into an emotionally overwrought one. And who wants to do that on a full stomach? I know I don’t. But no one asked me.
THE LOVE FEST: So how do I describe this particular ST? Basically it was one sweet, sloppy mess. I definitely could have done without the reminder that Ben was ALWAYS respectful and loving towards my mother...the only grandchild of his age group to merit that praise. But other than that cruel remark, the rest of the sharing was bearable. Many sharers made us laugh and only a few made us cry. All were eloquent and mercifully brief. And only a couple were delusional. That list would include Courtney’s dad who couldn’t find anything bad to say about Ben. He’s obviously never ridden in a 15-passenger van with him for 20 hours straight. But maybe it’s good for the in-laws to wear those rose-colored glasses...and choose to look past minor flaws.
SENTIMENTALLY-CHALLENGED: And a final note on STs in general. First of all, do we have to call it SHARE time? Mr. Rogers would like it...and my mother would. But I would prefer something less blatantly schmaltzy. Like "chatter-fest" or "shmooze-time". I never knew we called it anything until this particular wedding...and then the word "share" just made me nervous. Which leads me to my next final note on STs which is that I hope no one is offended when I don’t say my piece on these occasions. I always think I will, but at the last minute I chicken out. It’s not that I don’t have sickeningly sweet things to add...but I am not emotionally stable at this point in my life. I recently got teary-eyed when I got a new mouse at work...so can you imagine the drama that would ensue if I had to get up and talk about my Ben? I mean years ago, I took pictures and videos of him and sent them to some studio to see if they’d cast him in their Dennis the Menace movie...so obviously I’m a doting aunt. But I just can’t "share" right now.
My incisive (intelligently analytical and concise) narrative on THE GAMES will have to wait for Part IV. If they end up making a movie of my blog, there’s a good chance my seventh wedding post will have to be shot in two parts.
I had my old standby for lunch today...tuna and wheat thins. Still delicious after all these weeks.
SHARING TIME: We moved right into sharing time (hereinafter "ST") immediately following dinner. I felt we should have waited at least 30 minutes...like you do before you swim...so that no one would get sick. Because to tell you the truth, this part of the wedding weekend can be quite brutal, turning many a happily oblivious person into an emotionally overwrought one. And who wants to do that on a full stomach? I know I don’t. But no one asked me.
THE LOVE FEST: So how do I describe this particular ST? Basically it was one sweet, sloppy mess. I definitely could have done without the reminder that Ben was ALWAYS respectful and loving towards my mother...the only grandchild of his age group to merit that praise. But other than that cruel remark, the rest of the sharing was bearable. Many sharers made us laugh and only a few made us cry. All were eloquent and mercifully brief. And only a couple were delusional. That list would include Courtney’s dad who couldn’t find anything bad to say about Ben. He’s obviously never ridden in a 15-passenger van with him for 20 hours straight. But maybe it’s good for the in-laws to wear those rose-colored glasses...and choose to look past minor flaws.
SENTIMENTALLY-CHALLENGED: And a final note on STs in general. First of all, do we have to call it SHARE time? Mr. Rogers would like it...and my mother would. But I would prefer something less blatantly schmaltzy. Like "chatter-fest" or "shmooze-time". I never knew we called it anything until this particular wedding...and then the word "share" just made me nervous. Which leads me to my next final note on STs which is that I hope no one is offended when I don’t say my piece on these occasions. I always think I will, but at the last minute I chicken out. It’s not that I don’t have sickeningly sweet things to add...but I am not emotionally stable at this point in my life. I recently got teary-eyed when I got a new mouse at work...so can you imagine the drama that would ensue if I had to get up and talk about my Ben? I mean years ago, I took pictures and videos of him and sent them to some studio to see if they’d cast him in their Dennis the Menace movie...so obviously I’m a doting aunt. But I just can’t "share" right now.
My incisive (intelligently analytical and concise) narrative on THE GAMES will have to wait for Part IV. If they end up making a movie of my blog, there’s a good chance my seventh wedding post will have to be shot in two parts.
I had my old standby for lunch today...tuna and wheat thins. Still delicious after all these weeks.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 2 of maybe 7
THE REHEARSAL DINNER
SALLY IN CHARGE: Since my sister Sally was planning the rehearsal dinner, I pretty much knew what to expect. Bottom line is everything would be PERFECT...not only because Sally has an endearing little perfectionist streak, but also because she works hard to get things right. And because it’s what we do, the rest of us like to mock her for her mildly neurotic lifestyle, but at the same time we all try to emulate her. I, for one, feel like Ruth to her Naomi, and could easily say to her, "Whither thou goest to shop or vacation, I will go. At whatever restaurant thou eatest, I will eat. Thy apple pie shall be my apple pie, and thy stain remover shall be my stain remover." Seriously, if she uses it or makes it or likes it, I want to too.
SALLY IN CHARGE AT SUSAN’S: And I’m not the only one to feel this way. Funny story that may lose something in the translation but here goes anyway. For weeks Sally had been over at my sister Susan’s helping her organize things at her house. One day shortly after they had rearranged the kitchen, Susan’s husband Phil was searching the cupboards for something, let’s say garlic salt, and he finally calls to Susan, "Honey, where does Sally keep our garlic salt?"
TABLE DECOR: Anyway, the point is Sally did in fact put together a dilly of a rehearsal dinner. It was held in Courtney’s backyard, since she already had the tables and a tent set up there for the reception. In the center of each round table was a large pot filled with a riotous array of violet, purple and white pansies...or petunias...or some other sort of flower. I’m ashamed to admit I can hardly tell a daisy from a mum, so the identity of those lovely and festive flowers must remain a mystery. I was able to identify the other items on our table however. At each of our place settings was a personalized Jones Soda bottle and a sparkly Connie’s Cookie in the shape of a wedding cake and adorned with purple flourishes and an "H".
FOILED PLANS: Speaking of those cookies, I should point out that in spite of my careful plans to avoid helping with anything, I WAS pressed into service shortly after I arrived at Courtney’s to assist in the placement of said Connie’s Cookies on the tables. Now everyone knows that at Ben’s brother’s rehearsal dinner, I was one of the head cookie placers and at some point I noticed Sally following me around and RE-placing each cookie that I had placed. So naturally I assumed my name was on a list somewhere of people NOT to ask for help with table decor. But apparently this detail was overlooked, because they asked, and I helped, and the earth kept spinning on its axis.
THE DREADED JONES SODAS: And of course I cannot and will not ignore the elephant in the room. Otherwise known as the awkward Jones’ bottle affair. Because when I wrote a few weeks ago about Ben asking me to write something for him and then rejecting it, it was actually for the labels on the Jones’ bottles. See each label had a picture of the Happy Couple (hereinafter "HC") on the front, and on the back, a short, and admittedly sweet, message welcoming everyone to the dinner and thanking them for their support. And okay, yes. It was a fine message and not nearly as cheesy as it could have been. And in the end, I guess it’s nice that the HC wrote it themselves...since it was their picture on the bottle and not mine. Even so, I still couldn’t help but make several bitter comments to both Ben and Courtney at various times throughout the weekend. At one point, I think I made Ben cry and that’s when Courtney started giving me those "looks". Okay, not really. I didn’t make bitter comments (not about the Jones’ bottles anyway) and no one cried and Courtney never gave me any looks that weren’t loving. But I’m feeling the need to spice up this namby-pamby commentary a bit. Aren’t most wedding weekends supposed to have some tense moments...a little name-calling...and maybe some angry outbursts? Instead, we had nothing but nicey-nice stuff all the time. So you’ll excuse me if I feel the need to inject some fictional drama in here and there.
CHOW TIME: So we finally got to eat. They served a delicious Mexican feast which was catered by Alfredo’s, a restaurant in the O-city area (I think). I was so busy talking to my cousins while I ate that I didn’t get back for seconds before they were packing away the leftovers. But I did find out where they stored the leftover cookies and helped myself to a few. After all, I needed to keep up my strength for the coming sharing time and games.
And I don’t have time for more today...so sharing time and games will have to be Part 3. I’m sure you will be on the edges of your seats waiting for that next installment.
I had a hard, flour taco and fries for lunch...at the restaurant I had to boycott for awhile. The service was great today, by the way.
SALLY IN CHARGE: Since my sister Sally was planning the rehearsal dinner, I pretty much knew what to expect. Bottom line is everything would be PERFECT...not only because Sally has an endearing little perfectionist streak, but also because she works hard to get things right. And because it’s what we do, the rest of us like to mock her for her mildly neurotic lifestyle, but at the same time we all try to emulate her. I, for one, feel like Ruth to her Naomi, and could easily say to her, "Whither thou goest to shop or vacation, I will go. At whatever restaurant thou eatest, I will eat. Thy apple pie shall be my apple pie, and thy stain remover shall be my stain remover." Seriously, if she uses it or makes it or likes it, I want to too.
SALLY IN CHARGE AT SUSAN’S: And I’m not the only one to feel this way. Funny story that may lose something in the translation but here goes anyway. For weeks Sally had been over at my sister Susan’s helping her organize things at her house. One day shortly after they had rearranged the kitchen, Susan’s husband Phil was searching the cupboards for something, let’s say garlic salt, and he finally calls to Susan, "Honey, where does Sally keep our garlic salt?"
TABLE DECOR: Anyway, the point is Sally did in fact put together a dilly of a rehearsal dinner. It was held in Courtney’s backyard, since she already had the tables and a tent set up there for the reception. In the center of each round table was a large pot filled with a riotous array of violet, purple and white pansies...or petunias...or some other sort of flower. I’m ashamed to admit I can hardly tell a daisy from a mum, so the identity of those lovely and festive flowers must remain a mystery. I was able to identify the other items on our table however. At each of our place settings was a personalized Jones Soda bottle and a sparkly Connie’s Cookie in the shape of a wedding cake and adorned with purple flourishes and an "H".
FOILED PLANS: Speaking of those cookies, I should point out that in spite of my careful plans to avoid helping with anything, I WAS pressed into service shortly after I arrived at Courtney’s to assist in the placement of said Connie’s Cookies on the tables. Now everyone knows that at Ben’s brother’s rehearsal dinner, I was one of the head cookie placers and at some point I noticed Sally following me around and RE-placing each cookie that I had placed. So naturally I assumed my name was on a list somewhere of people NOT to ask for help with table decor. But apparently this detail was overlooked, because they asked, and I helped, and the earth kept spinning on its axis.
THE DREADED JONES SODAS: And of course I cannot and will not ignore the elephant in the room. Otherwise known as the awkward Jones’ bottle affair. Because when I wrote a few weeks ago about Ben asking me to write something for him and then rejecting it, it was actually for the labels on the Jones’ bottles. See each label had a picture of the Happy Couple (hereinafter "HC") on the front, and on the back, a short, and admittedly sweet, message welcoming everyone to the dinner and thanking them for their support. And okay, yes. It was a fine message and not nearly as cheesy as it could have been. And in the end, I guess it’s nice that the HC wrote it themselves...since it was their picture on the bottle and not mine. Even so, I still couldn’t help but make several bitter comments to both Ben and Courtney at various times throughout the weekend. At one point, I think I made Ben cry and that’s when Courtney started giving me those "looks". Okay, not really. I didn’t make bitter comments (not about the Jones’ bottles anyway) and no one cried and Courtney never gave me any looks that weren’t loving. But I’m feeling the need to spice up this namby-pamby commentary a bit. Aren’t most wedding weekends supposed to have some tense moments...a little name-calling...and maybe some angry outbursts? Instead, we had nothing but nicey-nice stuff all the time. So you’ll excuse me if I feel the need to inject some fictional drama in here and there.
CHOW TIME: So we finally got to eat. They served a delicious Mexican feast which was catered by Alfredo’s, a restaurant in the O-city area (I think). I was so busy talking to my cousins while I ate that I didn’t get back for seconds before they were packing away the leftovers. But I did find out where they stored the leftover cookies and helped myself to a few. After all, I needed to keep up my strength for the coming sharing time and games.
And I don’t have time for more today...so sharing time and games will have to be Part 3. I’m sure you will be on the edges of your seats waiting for that next installment.
I had a hard, flour taco and fries for lunch...at the restaurant I had to boycott for awhile. The service was great today, by the way.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
ANATOMY OF A WEDDING - Part 1 of maybe 7
THE REHEARSAL
FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING: On or about July 4th of 2009, my nephew Ben proposed to his girlfriend Courtney at Victoria Falls in Zambia, Africa. In order to surprise her, he had to enlist the help of various family members, and one of the principal conspirators for this covert operation was my Emily. It was she who secretly bore THE RING throughout the long, arduous journey from OKC to Zambia. So basically this engagement, and hence the wedding, could not have happened without her, or without me for that matter since she’s my child. So you’ll forgive me if I put a personal spin on almost everything that happened at the wedding of Ben and Courtney several weeks ago.
LET THE PARTY BEGIN: We hit town mid-afternoon on the day before the wedding, just in time to check into our motel, freshen up a bit, greet a few extended family members milling about the place, and head out to Courtney’s house for the rehearsal dinner. We saw no sense in getting there any earlier...in fact, it’s customary for me and my immediate family to arrive just in time for the actual festivities, and never early enough to help with anything, and this wedding was no exception.
MOTEL MEMORIES: A word about the motel wouldn’t be out of place here. This was reportedly the finest motel in H-town ($64/night worth of fine) and it did not disappoint. Although Dave noticed that the breakfast attendant tended to put only one banana or one muffin out at a time. And the pool was a bit on the small side, so I decided not to join the swimmers for fear of displacing most of the water. But aside from those rather minuscule flaws, the place was lovely...very clean...and we only had to ask for more towels and toilet paper once.
PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT: We missed most of the rehearsal (in trying to arrive just in time for the food) so I have very little to say about it. We did catch the tail end though, and noticed that everyone seemed to be doing what they were told. Although I heard a rumor that the ring bearer and flower girl went renegade earlier and SPRINTED down the aisle after being told to WALK. Who knew that two-year-olds could be so unpredictable? I also noticed that Zach (Ben’s brother and the minister for this occasion) was directing things, sort of, and this worried me a bit since I have personal knowledge that he didn’t know that was his job until shortly before the rehearsal began.
A SETTING SUBLIME: But as I looked upon the scene as a whole, I saw that nothing could or would ruin this wedding for Ben and Courtney. I mean, they couldn’t have a more perfect setting. The ceremony would take place in Courtney’s front "yard" which consisted of several lush, green acres of lawn with a spectacular view of undulating hills and the distant mirror of a lake. (I know that sounds like a cheesy travel brochure, but I can’t help it.) A bank of white chairs had been set up for the guests on this lawn, and were aligned PERFECTLY, thanks to the mathematical genius of one of the groomsmen (Luke). The whole scene fairly glistened in the late afternoon sun, and promised to do the same the next day for the actual ceremony. Can you say idyllic?
WEDDING PARTY: But there was another element of the scene that was even better than the venue...and that was the people there. Eight pretty bridesmaids in colorful sun dresses (from Africa!) and eight sweaty groomsmen in polo shirts and khaki shorts. Okay, I’m sure the guys were handsome too, but I had a hard time getting past the beads of sweat on their foreheads. But whether they were pretty and/or sweaty, I could just tell they all loved Ben and Courtney, and were happy to be a part of their special weekend.
OTHER PRETTY PEOPLE: Besides the wedding party, other friends were present and lots of family members. All were either helping with something or sitting around like me waiting for the food to be served. The musicians, a guitarist and the cutest little violinist you ever saw (Rachel), were busy setting up their stands and music under the shade of the porch in front of the house. The parents of the groom were flitting here and there, still putting an occasional finishing touch on the rehearsal dinner...which was about to be served in the back yard.
THE PRETTIEST PEOPLE: Last, but not least, the parents of the bride were busy finalizing details for the big day, but also taking time to greet and get to know their guests. I admire them greatly for their courage in having this wedding at their house, and also for their calmness in the midst of it all. They seemed to genuinely be enjoying the moments and not worrying about little things that probably didn’t matter. They managed not only to be gracious hosts, but also to be loving parents enjoying their only daughter’s wedding weekend as much as anyone.
So that’s it for Part 1. In Part 2 we will delve into the inner workings of the rehearsal dinner...with commentary on everything from the table decorations to the "sharing" time.
Meanwhile, I had leftover pizza, a grapefruit, and a watermelon slush for lunch today.
FELLOWSHIP OF THE RING: On or about July 4th of 2009, my nephew Ben proposed to his girlfriend Courtney at Victoria Falls in Zambia, Africa. In order to surprise her, he had to enlist the help of various family members, and one of the principal conspirators for this covert operation was my Emily. It was she who secretly bore THE RING throughout the long, arduous journey from OKC to Zambia. So basically this engagement, and hence the wedding, could not have happened without her, or without me for that matter since she’s my child. So you’ll forgive me if I put a personal spin on almost everything that happened at the wedding of Ben and Courtney several weeks ago.
LET THE PARTY BEGIN: We hit town mid-afternoon on the day before the wedding, just in time to check into our motel, freshen up a bit, greet a few extended family members milling about the place, and head out to Courtney’s house for the rehearsal dinner. We saw no sense in getting there any earlier...in fact, it’s customary for me and my immediate family to arrive just in time for the actual festivities, and never early enough to help with anything, and this wedding was no exception.
MOTEL MEMORIES: A word about the motel wouldn’t be out of place here. This was reportedly the finest motel in H-town ($64/night worth of fine) and it did not disappoint. Although Dave noticed that the breakfast attendant tended to put only one banana or one muffin out at a time. And the pool was a bit on the small side, so I decided not to join the swimmers for fear of displacing most of the water. But aside from those rather minuscule flaws, the place was lovely...very clean...and we only had to ask for more towels and toilet paper once.
PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT: We missed most of the rehearsal (in trying to arrive just in time for the food) so I have very little to say about it. We did catch the tail end though, and noticed that everyone seemed to be doing what they were told. Although I heard a rumor that the ring bearer and flower girl went renegade earlier and SPRINTED down the aisle after being told to WALK. Who knew that two-year-olds could be so unpredictable? I also noticed that Zach (Ben’s brother and the minister for this occasion) was directing things, sort of, and this worried me a bit since I have personal knowledge that he didn’t know that was his job until shortly before the rehearsal began.
A SETTING SUBLIME: But as I looked upon the scene as a whole, I saw that nothing could or would ruin this wedding for Ben and Courtney. I mean, they couldn’t have a more perfect setting. The ceremony would take place in Courtney’s front "yard" which consisted of several lush, green acres of lawn with a spectacular view of undulating hills and the distant mirror of a lake. (I know that sounds like a cheesy travel brochure, but I can’t help it.) A bank of white chairs had been set up for the guests on this lawn, and were aligned PERFECTLY, thanks to the mathematical genius of one of the groomsmen (Luke). The whole scene fairly glistened in the late afternoon sun, and promised to do the same the next day for the actual ceremony. Can you say idyllic?
WEDDING PARTY: But there was another element of the scene that was even better than the venue...and that was the people there. Eight pretty bridesmaids in colorful sun dresses (from Africa!) and eight sweaty groomsmen in polo shirts and khaki shorts. Okay, I’m sure the guys were handsome too, but I had a hard time getting past the beads of sweat on their foreheads. But whether they were pretty and/or sweaty, I could just tell they all loved Ben and Courtney, and were happy to be a part of their special weekend.
OTHER PRETTY PEOPLE: Besides the wedding party, other friends were present and lots of family members. All were either helping with something or sitting around like me waiting for the food to be served. The musicians, a guitarist and the cutest little violinist you ever saw (Rachel), were busy setting up their stands and music under the shade of the porch in front of the house. The parents of the groom were flitting here and there, still putting an occasional finishing touch on the rehearsal dinner...which was about to be served in the back yard.
THE PRETTIEST PEOPLE: Last, but not least, the parents of the bride were busy finalizing details for the big day, but also taking time to greet and get to know their guests. I admire them greatly for their courage in having this wedding at their house, and also for their calmness in the midst of it all. They seemed to genuinely be enjoying the moments and not worrying about little things that probably didn’t matter. They managed not only to be gracious hosts, but also to be loving parents enjoying their only daughter’s wedding weekend as much as anyone.
So that’s it for Part 1. In Part 2 we will delve into the inner workings of the rehearsal dinner...with commentary on everything from the table decorations to the "sharing" time.
Meanwhile, I had leftover pizza, a grapefruit, and a watermelon slush for lunch today.
Friday, July 9, 2010
MALE DANCERS
I was telling Dave about my comparison of my family to a legal nuisance...and he said we were more like an "attractive nuisance". That’s another legal concept that says (basically) if you have attractive, but dangerous, stuff in your backyard, like maybe a pool or a trampoline, then you have to take reasonable precautions to keep small children who might be attracted to such items from wandering onto your property and getting hurt. So at first I thought Dave was being sweet and saying that my family is like an ATTRACTIVE BACKYARD POOL rather than a town dump. And naturally I was flattered...until I started analyzing the comment. Maybe he meant that my family is dangerous to small children. Or maybe he was thinking about how much maintenance a pool requires...and how some people just fill them in because they are so much work. Maybe he was trying to tell me something. I don’t really know now.
What I do know is that I’ve been promising that wedding post series, and not delivering on it. But it’s been so long now since the happy event that I’ve forgotten many of the details and I’m having to make things up as I go along. Everyone knows that fiction is much more difficult to write than non-fiction. So you’ll just have to bear with me. It’s like that festering boil...it WILL explode some day...but not before its time. Did I just compare my wedding posts to a boil? I do apologize...it won’t happen again.
Meanwhile, I have that fun stuff I promised you on the children.
Emily did not take the news that LeBron is heading for Miami well. She said she was disappointed and angry. I told her she shouldn’t let her emotions be ruled by the actions of a professional athlete. She said she hoped he would break his leg.
Meanwhile, she has compiled a list of old videos which we haven’t watched in years. They are titles such as The Buttercream Gang, Summer of the Monkeys, and Mighty Joe Young. She wants us all to watch them with her this summer before she leaves home. And we can’t say no because we are being held hostage by that "she won’t be around much longer" mentality. It’s depressing on more than one level, if you know what I mean.
Rachel continues to take her role as my professional trainer seriously. At times, anyway. Last night at the track she said to me cheerily, "Let’s jog this next lap." In the spirit of cooperation and compromise, I said, "Let’s jog this next curve." She said okay, and I proceeded to move my arms a bit more though the curve, and put a little bounce in my steps, and I think she actually thought I was jogging. At least for a minute or two. Then she said, "Try to pick your feet up a bit more." And that’s when I had to tell her that I couldn’t breathe and my knees were hurting. So she backed off. So far, since she’s been on the job, I’ve gained 2 pounds.
David is suddenly in high demand as a DANCER. True story. First he was asked to be in a Quinceanera...which is a big coming of age birthday extravaganza thrown by Latin American families on their daughters’ 15th birthdays. I’m not sure if I’ve told you this before but he thinks he’s Latino, at times anyway. Last year he got asked to attend a Latinos Make a Difference conference at school (I don’t know why) and that kind of sealed the deal for him. He also thinks he’s fluent in Spanish even though I’ve only heard him say things like "that’s a pretty chicken" and "put down your gun", so I don’t know how far that will get him.
But the point is he agreed a few months ago to be one of the attendants at this Quineanera where he has to perform these dances and he has to wear a vest and he wasn’t complaining at all. But then Rachel’s dance teacher asked if he would do this swing dance with one of her groups...and he said yes but then he found out the swing dance performance was on the same day as the Quinceanera. And he was torn. So he called me at work to ask for advice. And of course I told him that the Quineanera girl had dibs on him because she asked first, but he would have make his own decision. And I think he was really just worried about telling either of them no because he knows good male dancers are hard to come by in this town. But later he called me back and said he was sticking with the Quinceanera...because he didn’t want to be a loser like LeBron and switch teams. And I could accept that logic.
Dave is finally reaping what he hath sowed...and that would be a boatload of zucchini. We had a unofficial duel the other night...he whipped up a healthy stir fry dish with the zucchini, while I dipped slices of it in egg and cornmeal and fried it up in a pan. The kids were the judges, and guess who won?
I had no lunch today because I worked through the noon hour. But for dinner I had a slice of pizza at Sam’s. Pathetic, I know.
What I do know is that I’ve been promising that wedding post series, and not delivering on it. But it’s been so long now since the happy event that I’ve forgotten many of the details and I’m having to make things up as I go along. Everyone knows that fiction is much more difficult to write than non-fiction. So you’ll just have to bear with me. It’s like that festering boil...it WILL explode some day...but not before its time. Did I just compare my wedding posts to a boil? I do apologize...it won’t happen again.
Meanwhile, I have that fun stuff I promised you on the children.
Emily did not take the news that LeBron is heading for Miami well. She said she was disappointed and angry. I told her she shouldn’t let her emotions be ruled by the actions of a professional athlete. She said she hoped he would break his leg.
Meanwhile, she has compiled a list of old videos which we haven’t watched in years. They are titles such as The Buttercream Gang, Summer of the Monkeys, and Mighty Joe Young. She wants us all to watch them with her this summer before she leaves home. And we can’t say no because we are being held hostage by that "she won’t be around much longer" mentality. It’s depressing on more than one level, if you know what I mean.
Rachel continues to take her role as my professional trainer seriously. At times, anyway. Last night at the track she said to me cheerily, "Let’s jog this next lap." In the spirit of cooperation and compromise, I said, "Let’s jog this next curve." She said okay, and I proceeded to move my arms a bit more though the curve, and put a little bounce in my steps, and I think she actually thought I was jogging. At least for a minute or two. Then she said, "Try to pick your feet up a bit more." And that’s when I had to tell her that I couldn’t breathe and my knees were hurting. So she backed off. So far, since she’s been on the job, I’ve gained 2 pounds.
David is suddenly in high demand as a DANCER. True story. First he was asked to be in a Quinceanera...which is a big coming of age birthday extravaganza thrown by Latin American families on their daughters’ 15th birthdays. I’m not sure if I’ve told you this before but he thinks he’s Latino, at times anyway. Last year he got asked to attend a Latinos Make a Difference conference at school (I don’t know why) and that kind of sealed the deal for him. He also thinks he’s fluent in Spanish even though I’ve only heard him say things like "that’s a pretty chicken" and "put down your gun", so I don’t know how far that will get him.
But the point is he agreed a few months ago to be one of the attendants at this Quineanera where he has to perform these dances and he has to wear a vest and he wasn’t complaining at all. But then Rachel’s dance teacher asked if he would do this swing dance with one of her groups...and he said yes but then he found out the swing dance performance was on the same day as the Quinceanera. And he was torn. So he called me at work to ask for advice. And of course I told him that the Quineanera girl had dibs on him because she asked first, but he would have make his own decision. And I think he was really just worried about telling either of them no because he knows good male dancers are hard to come by in this town. But later he called me back and said he was sticking with the Quinceanera...because he didn’t want to be a loser like LeBron and switch teams. And I could accept that logic.
Dave is finally reaping what he hath sowed...and that would be a boatload of zucchini. We had a unofficial duel the other night...he whipped up a healthy stir fry dish with the zucchini, while I dipped slices of it in egg and cornmeal and fried it up in a pan. The kids were the judges, and guess who won?
I had no lunch today because I worked through the noon hour. But for dinner I had a slice of pizza at Sam’s. Pathetic, I know.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
THE SARDINE CAN
My brother Paul invited the whole clan to his neck of the plains for the 4th of July weekend. As incentive, he offered golf outings, pool time, a fireworks show, and free meals. So of course most of us showed. And we proved once again that even a nice roomy house can feel like a sardine can when you add 26 warm bodies. But my family will endure any amount of chaos to be together. Which makes us charming and quirky, right? And not scary or weird at all.
Of course, I must admit that the girls in this family have had a difficult time scaring up men to marry them. And since they’re all very beautiful and only a tiny bit loud and obnoxious at times, I have to wonder if maybe the family is responsible for scaring off any potential suitors. Which makes me appreciate all the more the ones that finally say "I do" to this family...they are truly brave souls and I can’t say enough good things about them.
But the whole marrying into this family thing reminds me of that old legal concept known as "coming to the nuisance". Basically, it means that if you’re dumb enough to buy a house next to the town dump, you can’t sue the dump for smelling up your air. Of course, I’m not calling everyone who has married into this family dumb, but the bottom line is that they each CHOSE to join this town dump of a family, and so they can’t now complain that we are smelling up their air, right? And they all seem to understand that concept which makes them even more precious.
Which transitions me nicely into my first wedding post (which isn’t this one, but might be the next) because it’s going to be all about the latest brave soul, Courtney, who CHOSE to marry our Ben...and how we didn’t trick her or anything to get her into the family. Not that we wouldn’t have stooped to that level, if we’d had to, because she’s such a great girl. I can’t say that she completes us, because that might hurt Thomas’s feelings since he’s marrying Betsy in August...if we don’t scare him off before then. But Courtney definitely makes us a better family. Because when she can get a word in edgewise, she smooths out some of our rough edges. Seriously. We seem nicer when she’s around.
I have some great stuff on the kids...but Dave just called to say Emily wants to go for a walk. And right now, when Emily says JUMP, we say HOW HIGH? Because we don’t want to have any regrets come August 21st.
I had a turkey and spinach sandwich for lunch...and too many chips. I knew I shouldn’t eat them straight from the bag but I did anyway. Because my personal trainer wasn’t around to stop me.
Of course, I must admit that the girls in this family have had a difficult time scaring up men to marry them. And since they’re all very beautiful and only a tiny bit loud and obnoxious at times, I have to wonder if maybe the family is responsible for scaring off any potential suitors. Which makes me appreciate all the more the ones that finally say "I do" to this family...they are truly brave souls and I can’t say enough good things about them.
But the whole marrying into this family thing reminds me of that old legal concept known as "coming to the nuisance". Basically, it means that if you’re dumb enough to buy a house next to the town dump, you can’t sue the dump for smelling up your air. Of course, I’m not calling everyone who has married into this family dumb, but the bottom line is that they each CHOSE to join this town dump of a family, and so they can’t now complain that we are smelling up their air, right? And they all seem to understand that concept which makes them even more precious.
Which transitions me nicely into my first wedding post (which isn’t this one, but might be the next) because it’s going to be all about the latest brave soul, Courtney, who CHOSE to marry our Ben...and how we didn’t trick her or anything to get her into the family. Not that we wouldn’t have stooped to that level, if we’d had to, because she’s such a great girl. I can’t say that she completes us, because that might hurt Thomas’s feelings since he’s marrying Betsy in August...if we don’t scare him off before then. But Courtney definitely makes us a better family. Because when she can get a word in edgewise, she smooths out some of our rough edges. Seriously. We seem nicer when she’s around.
I have some great stuff on the kids...but Dave just called to say Emily wants to go for a walk. And right now, when Emily says JUMP, we say HOW HIGH? Because we don’t want to have any regrets come August 21st.
I had a turkey and spinach sandwich for lunch...and too many chips. I knew I shouldn’t eat them straight from the bag but I did anyway. Because my personal trainer wasn’t around to stop me.
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